21 Questions On The Unborn Conundrum


One, The Unborn Dead First I am liquid, only one of many fluids, I cause no trouble, am serene, like the druids Even then I’m alive, though filled with uncertainty. Thinking, what is this sac that holds me in captivity? Time passes; I grow in body and mind. When do I get noticed by the…


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The Unborn Dead

First I am liquid, only one of many fluids,

I cause no trouble, am serene, like the druids

Even then I’m alive, though filled with uncertainty.

Thinking, what is this sac that holds me in captivity?

Time passes; I grow in body and mind.

When do I get noticed by the parent mind?

Why pour these hot fluids on me? They burn me.

Imbibe more fruits. They develop and form me.

Oh I’ve been noticed, now, no more foods come.

Aha! How restless the parent mind has become.

Now I have an idea. Too young to let me stay

And little stones come. For what purpose I pray?

Stop the stones. They turn me back to blood

Am I deformed, my limbs, they refuse to bud

Oho! They’ve stopped. Do I have time to re-grow?

I sense a larger space out. Have I enough to show?

But I have to struggle. I sense my minder worried.

Am I that much trouble? She seems so harried.

Where are you going? Oh no! I sense danger here.

Wait! Wait! My screams are not loud enough to hear

Um wait. Won’t I find out what I have to give?

Am I to be killed before I have a chance to live?

Aha! The sword of Damocles, it sucks me out of my harbour

Sliding fitfully into oblivion, I scream pitifully, ET TU’ DOCTOR!




I wrote the above poem in 2010. Six Years ago. Not difficult to deduce my stance on Abortion right?

Well, you aren’t exactly correct. I like to believe I wrote it in an era of naivety. You know, sort of like William Blake’s Songs of Innocence and Experience. That was my period of Innocence.

Now? I don’t know. This is as sensitive an issue as any other, in any society. (It makes and breaks elections in the US). Also, although a lot has been said about it, still, not enough. Some better writers than me here on this site have postulated for or against it, with various degrees of Success and engagements.

I’ve read a number of posts here, on this issue, and the responses have been err… let’s just say enlightening.

First off, lets agree on the basics, We’re talking about Abortions due to unwanted pregnancies. Not Medical complications-induced abortions.

I’d like to go after it in piecemeal so I can gather my thoughts. People look at it in different ways.

  • Religion– It’s a no-no. Every Religion, Christian, Muslim, Buddhist, Jewish, whichever, all condemn it. I’m catholic, so, faith wise, I should ascribe to what my religious doctrines say. Again, some people here can probably shed more light on it here than I can.
  • Realism – Some people prefer to take a more realistic POV here, and say the persons involved should take a decision whether or not they want to keep the baby, irrespective of their religious or moral inclinations.
  • Feminism – Now there are women, and to a lesser extent, men, who adjudge that there is no moral quandary here. They insist that the woman, and the woman alone should be responsible for the decision whether or not the baby is kept to term, since she and she alone supposedly undergoes the difficulties of pregnancy and birthing.
  • Idealists – Some of us who believe that the baby should be taken to term, irrespective of all, there is always a way out, a way for the child to be taken care of, irrespective of the circumstances of the parents. It will all work out in the end right? All’s well that ends well.

I know almost all of us will assume to belong to at least one of these groupings.

Permit me to call a mild Bullshit on all of them. First off, the Religious person/leader who insists the child must be kept will not help the initial victim – the woman to bear the rigours of pregnancy, endure delivery, which I am assured is very painful, take care of an infant which, I have seen firsthand, is tough going. Neither will the Realist help you fight the depression and attacks of conscience that is usually associated with an abortion, even for the most jaded of girls. The Feminist is more likely to turn the girl to a cause than to help, and for the Idealist, the less said, the better. Please don’t say ‘All’s well that ends well’. Even that Shakespearean comedy ended farcically.

Therefore, I have the following questions I’d like answered.

What should we really be focusing on? The symptoms or the Cause, is killing the Spider not more effective than constantly cleaning cobwebs?

Instead of forcing the pregnant girl to keep an unwanted pregnancy, even after being abandoned by the man responsible, and/or disgraced by the parent or guardian, why aren’t we making a play for enlightening parents and Guardians that having a pregnant ward/girl child isn’t the end of the world?

Shouldn’t we be asking why the bulk of the Sex-Ed most of us in this forum have is from books/friends? Why aren’t we asking why it is absent in our national curriculum for public and private schools?

Shouldn’t our religious leaders, knowing the influence they have on our largely uneducated/unenlightened older generation make efforts to re-orient the minds of these people so as to reduce the shame and stigma associated with teenage/single motherhood, and foster more acceptance and accommodation amongst our parents and Guardians?

Shouldn’t there be a clamour for our elected and appointed leaders to make concrete efforts to avail the nation, especially the poor with credible public health care, to ally girls’ fears of delivery complications, and encourage them to take pregnancies to term?

Should we not be asking why tertiary institutions, especially private ones, still expel any lady found to be pregnant while in school? Did the pregnancy suddenly destroy her ability to study, to learn? Did her brain become pregnant too? Why force her to hide the pregnancy and then choose the route of Abortion here?

We have very few orphanages in the country. Knowing how poorly run they are, what happened to volunteering to help out sometimes at some of them, instead of visiting only on our birthdays to take pictures for social media and to assuage our consciences? Why aren’t we making the choice of keeping the pregnancy to term attractive for pregnant girls?

Again, to we, our current generation of youths, our ‘woke’ generation, when did we become so cynical, so hardscrabble, so jaded, that we’ve become in danger of losing our humanity? Who chairmanned the forum where we decided and agreed that life is a Yes/No, Agree/Disagree, White/Black situation? What happened to fluidity, to grey areas? What happened to examining things according to their specific circumstances, instead of allowing ourselves to become so polarized by divides, to become like the Americans and their Roe V Wade fixation?

Why have we stopped thinking for ourselves and decided that we must belong to someone else’s school of thought?

Why am I asking all these questions I have no answers to?

Kindly help me answer them.


  1. Toby
    Okay, i adore this piece. Thanks.
    Lets help tackle the questions and look for answers…Yayyy!!
    Now first, I am a feminist, but understand i am one of the real ones who actually would not turn the person into a cause (even though i see nothing wrong in that).
    Now unto the answers:
    The Play-Its hard to make a play for enlightenment when most of the countrymen are uneducated welps who use culture as an excuse for their ignorance. So moot on that point.
    Sex-Ed-This is dicey because as a millennial, i am all for teaching sex ed and i do not mean that whole abstinence is key bull shit but more the “if something is entering your hole….any hole, make sure it is covered. No glove, No Love huntay” mind set, but i have a little brother and i cringe when it comes to time to teach him about sex and how the body works.
    Religious Leaders-Bah, please i have never put any sort of responsibility on any religious leader except to make you feel guilt.
    Elected Officials-are you serious, do you expect anything from them, No literally, do you?
    Tertiary Institutions-This one is something i actually know, for most Public i know there would be stigma but essentially its from the people. At the Private institutions, we all know how wonky their rules are, and by wonky, i mean fucked up. So if you go to a school where it says do not get pregnant and you do. I assure you i would not fight for you.
    And for us Woke-Honey, I and quite a few other people do not believe the world is grey, it is a cacophony of colors that gets only more chaotic and beautiful as time goes on.
    Know it is hard fighting a fight like this, cuz in places where they are not blinded by culture there is still not a confirmed decision and everyone is still very divided on this. I literally just asked a social worker who counsels on this issue and asked her what would she do and she said, she would counsel her not to abort it, because think about the baby.
  2. Hephie Brown
    Nigerians never attack the root of the problem.. only the results! It’s like how they don’t address rapists or perverts but address seductive dressing by girls and everyone leaves it at “better safe than sorry”.

    Why do we shame young girls that get pregnant and not the young man who planted the seed?
    “Why aren’t we making the choice of keeping the pregnancy to term attractive for pregnant girls?”

    I am neither for or against.. I have a “grey area personality” on most issues..adulthood has formed me well.. An unmarried girl getting pregnant does not have any palatable option in Nigeria… so any route she takes, it should always be her choice.Always.

    I absolutely love how you presented this issue Buchi! love love love!

  3. Aggie
    I used to think, there was no excuse for an abortion until I saw firsthand how difficult it is for a lady to go through the nine months of stress alone, after that time I just really respected the girls who kept the baby regardless of the situation and I stopped judging those who abort. I find myself wondering what I’ll do though if I ever find myself in such a situation, I’ll like to believe I wouldn’t abort but I guess it’s easier said than done and nine months is a really long time.

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