Dear Women: Don’t Downplay Your Contribution To His Success

Opinion

Someone please tell me what is wrong with us women. Let me apologize for that tone. After taking in a lot of recent happenings in the media, I got a little agitated. So here I am today writing to you asking for assistance in understanding why some of us women acknowledge our men’s successes and either downplay our contribution…

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Someone please tell me what is wrong with us women.

Let me apologize for that tone. After taking in a lot of recent happenings in the media, I got a little agitated. So here I am today writing to you asking for assistance in understanding why some of us women acknowledge our men’s successes and either downplay our contribution or completely forget it?

Is this unique to Africa? Does it have to do with how we are raised? The man is the head of the family and we are taught to follow their lead but today, please allow me to share some thoughts based on my believe that women are more than sidekicks in our families.

  1. He prepares for work, you fix his suit, neck tie and socks.
  2. You make him breakfast, pack his breakfast and maybe his lunch too.
  3. You take care of most of the household maybe using his money and some of yours. (Compare an average bachelor’s house with an average married man’s house).

Have you noticed that most men often discuss their plans with their partners possibly because they are looking for approval or second opinions. Pastor TD Jakes once said he shares his planned sermon with his madam and asks, “Am I on the right track?”

On the contrary, I have noticed most women go back home after work and also tell their partners about their day but in a different way. “Oh honey, today I did this,” and he says “Wow! That’s great.” Most times you get this “I knew it was a great idea which is why I did it” vibe from women even though they never show it.

I have realized that some women suppress their contribution to the successes of their men because of the supposed rewards/gifts they get from them. But I wonder if they dont realise that these things we enjoy are the fruits of our labour. For example, he appreciates your support so he buys you a car. He appreciates how you take care of the family so he buys you a home… being a woman of virtue has to amount to something.

I long for the day men will embrace this new truth. Women need to realize what they are made of, the power within us and more importantly, that we actually contribute more than we get credit for and more than we give ourselves credit for in our families.

I am single and currently enjoy being alone but that didn’t inspire this piece because I appreciate men who love and respect their women. As much as we hear some men appreciating our support, I just also want use to say it more and possibly louder too. Who is with me?

Responses

  1. ButterflyMind
    Pardon me, perhaps I’m slow today.
    But what exactly are you trying to communicate? I’ve read three times and still don’t get.

    Is it that women contribute to the success of their men and aren’t appreciated enough?
    Or that women contribute to their men’s success and don’t laud their contribution to the world?
    Or that men do not realise the role of the women to their success?
    Or that… I don’t even know again. I’m also trying to tie this together with the title and I can’t.

    Plix epp. My brain is asleep this morning or my mind must have fluttered away.

    1. LincayaD Post author
      Hi Butterfly,

      The article is in two ways. Women downplay themselves and not applaud themselves enough for the success of their families. For example, the house wife may feel undervalued and forget that she is the “House Manager” and the man does not have to worry about their homes. On the other hand, Man give themselves so much credit for their success and well being and forget that what they give to us we give back multiplied starting from his cleanliness, respect and the honor he is getting.

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