I have a way of life, an interesting way of life. I dream differently, I dream to live, after all its just one life, so why not live it well. To live is the rarest thing in the world, most people just exist. Sometimes I close my eyes and realize that if I die today, the world won’t stop, people will adjust and carry on without you, with time you become nothing but a memory.
From a very little age, I have always wanted to do things my way, it was mostly my way or no other way. I have always been the black sheep, I remember my mother always comparing me to my brother “why can’t you be more like your brother”, she will say. She tried to tame me in lots of ways. Not that I was wild or overly crazy, I realized she just saw a difference, I was not like the others, I thought differently and being different as we know is not typically a good thing to some people.
As soon as I had the chance, I left home; I left home in pursuit of happiness. I met people, different kinds of people, the judgy kind, the normal ones, the carefree ones, the observers, the opinionated ones that had a say in how you should live your life, the abnormal ones, the crazy ones, even the monitoring spirits, I met them all. I tried to find where I fit in. For a long time, I just floated and dabbled, till I realized it was all about happiness. I didn’t change so that people will like me, I stuck to being myself and the right people loved me for me. Though I lost some people, I gained awesome ones. All these shaped me.
This is what I want and how I have decided to live. I will live as if every day might be my last. I want to be independent. I want to feel everything life has to offer, I want to know what it’s like to fall in love and fall out of love. I want to know what it feels like to get heartbroken, have rebound sex, love again, I want to feel it all. I want to travel and swim with the Dolphins, I want to get married and have a baby. Now, this only happens if I meet that man that can tolerate all my crazy and still stay, I have learned to kill myself over things I can’t control. I won’t be a sad spinster if that doesn’t happen because I believe marriage is not meant for everyone, I will be equally happy to have a baby. Now, don’t get this wrong, I won’t be a “baby mama”, I will be a single mother.
I want people to stop judging, life is not that serious. Don’t be stuck within the boundary of traditions, values, and norms that were here before you came, most that don’t even make any sense but we can’t seem to let go. Do things differently, never say never. Its only one life, live it well and live it to the fullest. At the end of the day all that matters is your happiness and when asked you can boldly say, I LIVED.