A Guide On How To Treat Your Woman

Opinion

A lot of times, men are accused of not knowing how to keep and treat their bae and that’s really sad because ignorance is not an excuse so I’m going to list the most basic rules there are to treating your woman the right way. Please note that following rules do not guarantee for a…

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A lot of times, men are accused of not knowing how to keep and treat their bae and that’s really sad because ignorance is not an excuse so I’m going to list the most basic rules there are to treating your woman the right way. Please note that following rules do not guarantee for a successful relationship but I’m pretty sure they reduce the probability of a failed relationship.

  • If you know she’s someone you see yourself with in future, respect her and stop messing around.
  • Stop trying to be controlling! Remember, boyfriend/husband, not parent.
  • If she asks you about a certain thing randomly, DO NOT LIE because 9 out of 10 times, she already knows the truth.
  • IMO, it’s cool to have a female best friend but at the same time, you have to let her know that you have a girlfriend now so she has to fall back a wee bit. You don’t need to cut her off completely but there’s a line that has to be drawn.
  • I believe in personal space so it’s fine if she wants to go out with her friends or something without you. Remember, boyfriend, not shadow.
  • If you don’t buy her clothes, don’t try and tell her what she can and cannot wear. She should have enough respect for herself to know what she should and shouldn’t wear out in public.
  • If she’s your girl, (tr)eat her without her asking. Make sure her soul leaves her body!
  • Don’t ask or expect anything in return for something you did for her because it should be from the kindness of your heart and because you want to.
  • A simple “I love you” could make her day 20 times better so tell her a lot (she won’t get tired of hearing it)
  • Not Mr. Macho-I-Have-Chest-Hair all the time…let her see your soft side.
  • Its “bros over hoes” not “bros over your girl”!
  • You shouldn’t have to go through her phone! She’s not a child! This is where trust comes in.
  • When going through a rough patch, LEAVE SOCIAL MEDIA OUT OF IT! That’s the quickest way to end up single.
  • Don’t make her feel insecure about herself; tell her how beautiful she is as often as possible.
  • If she does something you’re uncomfortable with, tell her immediately! Don’t wait till you get into an argument because by then, it’s irrelevant.
  • You shouldn’t have sex ALL the time.

Sit down and have real conversations about stuff. Cook together, play games have fun outside the bed afterall, she IS your BFF.

  • Ask her how her day was, show her you care; give her booty rubs as she tells you about it.
  • It’s cool to take her out every once in a while.

Doesn’t always have to be anywhere expensive, she’d love it as long as she’s with you.

  • When she’s having a bad day, hold her. You don’t have to say a thing. Sometimes, they just want to be held.
  • Personally, I’m a fan of blowing up her phone with cute stuff. Some like it, some don’t. Know your girl and act accordingly.
  • Girls don’t like it when you’re sentimental all the time. If she does something you don’t approve of or you don’t agree with something she suggested, tell her. You’d don’t have to agree with what she says all the time.
  • Take some interest in some of the things she likes to do.
  • Learn how to do her nails and make bantu knots because they like it (trust me on this).
  • Let her know you appreciate her and everything she does for you. Say it and show it.
  • If you really love her, you’re going to change your ways to better yourself. Not because she tells you to but because you want to.
  • If she tells you not to talk to a certain girl, it’s because she knows her intentions. Even if you think she’s being silly, listen to her.
  • Put your bloody pride aside. It’s okay for your girl to want to pay for stuff once in a while.
  • Let your girl spoil you! It doesn’t reduce your manhood. She’s just trying to show she appreciates you.
  • Don’t be afraid to show her off in public
  • She’s going to have your back more than your guys will so always talk to her first about doubts, fears, uncertainties and your plans. Listen to what she has to say.
  • If you can’t cook, your sex game better be 100% and your tongue game 1000%.
  • Learn how to admit when you messed up or when you’re wrong.
  • Stop getting mad at when other guys try to hit on her. Take it as a compliment that others want what you have. If she’s loyal, you’ve got no reason to be mad.

Ladies, did I miss out anything?

Image via CitiFMOnline

Responses

  1. Otunba O
    i guess it all borders on trust.. am sure every guy in his right senses will treat his woman thus and even more. the problem is most guys have no idea if she is a ‘lady to be treated well’ or if they are stuck with an unfaithful hoe
    1+
    1. Cavey
      So what, You hold out in her till you’re sure she’s worth it? How do you determine if she is? Biko, it’s a relationship not a business investment. You don’t always have to be certain, you just have to want it to walk
      11+
      1. Otunba O
        i made no mention of all the ‘defensive’ lines you just pulled. its a plausible fact most affections go to the undeserving. if a relationship is to be built,trust is essential and you don’t do that by suspecting your partner and playing the feds,.all you do is just give in and treat her like your queen and ……but that doesn’t rule out the place of common sense.
        0
  2. yar"arewa
    Cavey! Cavey!! Cavey!!! Omo dada, yaro mai hankali………need help in igbo, God bless you especially pionts in %.:)
    1+
  3. SeryxMe
    “Stop getting mad at when other guys try to hit on her. Take it as a compliment that others want what you have. If she’s loyal, you’ve got no reason to be mad.”

    This is very correct. But the problem is, many times, Chris Brown is right. 😀

    6+
    1. Seriously...
      So you as a dude, you will vex every time a guy checks her out?

      No real woman has time for all that drama abeg.

      Instead of vexing, why not try this instead (or whatever version works for you):

      “See hot cake! Who no like better thing? Man, am I one lucky dude!”

      As said in his post, other guys wanting what you have is a compliment to you. Let your girl know you are glad she chose you instead of acting all insecure.

      1+
      1. SeryxMe
        Lol . I no know who vex you this morning. Just relax, take a deep breath and read my comment again. If you still don’t get it, I’ll explain.
        0
        1. Seriously...
          LOL Vexed? Me? My reply was made in the spirit of TNC, the post and comments, which I understood to be laidback and a witty exchange of thoughts and ideas. No offence was/is intended. I encourage you to read my initial reply again.

          Sha, if I understood you correctly, you defended a guy’s right to be upset when his babe is hit on constantly. You even cited Chris Brown as an authority.

          I disagreed with you and actually suggested that rather than vexing, a better (more mature) strategy might be for a guy to let his “hot cake, all that” bae know that he feels luck she chose him. All the vexing might actually end up hurting the relationship.

          If you still read this as an angry response, I am not sure what to say again except #Itzokay

          2+
          1. Cavey
            , all what said was “these hoes ain’t loyal” ????
            You people need to camdan and play nice. Oya take, pints on me ????????
            3+
          2. SeryxMe
            Okay, just tried to put forward my point but I’ll break it down further. Here’s the quote in two parts:

            “Stop getting mad at when other guys try to hit on her. Take it as a compliment that others want what you have.”

            I said “This is very correct.” I perfectly understand that people hitting on my girl is not a problem with her and is a compliment to me. I’m very happy about that.

            “If she’s loyal, you’ve got no reason to be mad.”

            You see the “if”? This statement may be interpreted as if she’s not loyal, then you have a reason to be mad. And I said “But the problem is, many times, Chris Brown is right.” This is because Chris Brown sang “These hoes ain’t loyal” and I think this happens many times. If your girl isn’t loyal, then you have a big problem on your hands.

            From this breakdown, I guess you’ll see why I see your response coming across as if you’re vexed. You took my comment and totally misinterpreted it and then proceeded to respond to the misinterpretation. You really should have camdan.

            “Sha, if I understood you correctly, you defended a guy’s right to be upset when his babe is hit on constantly. You even cited Chris Brown as an authority.” < ----- This is all shades of wrong!

            1+
  • Uche
    Chris Brown spoke about a certain species of females. Unless your female belongs to that specie. If you have one, remember what they say about birds of a feather
    5+
  • Seriously...
    Thanks for the clarification and the pints. Hope mine is Kunu?

    Appreciate you reading my breakdown and clarifying my misunderstanding. I am sure you can also appreciate how unnecessarily caustic your response looked from my side of things.

    Back to Bae. If she is not loyal, dude’s vexing or not will still not solve anything.

    0
    1. SeryxMe
      , the vexing statement was just bants sha. ????

      As for bae being disloyal, I think it will be very understandable if the guy vexes knowing bae to be disloyal. I’m not advocating for guys being angry at anyone hitting up on her, I’m just saying that her loyalty to you is key in how you react to these advances towards her.

      0
      1. Ray
        Hehehehe. You missed me.
        Well, I missed my other life as Artemis so I took a trip to Mount Olympus.

        Posted from TNC Mobile

        0
  • Seriously...
    Nice write-up.

    Guys, read and learn oh. Read and learn.

    The booty rubs could be substituted for booby rubs. As long as it is a genuine show of care and not always an attempt to “be starting something,” it is all good.

    Anything nice you do for her “just because” will always go down well.

    1+
  • EMPIRE
    Learn how to do her nails and make bantu knots because they like it (trust me on this).

    I don’t know abt all dat bruv……….I rather gist with her while she does It herself.

    3+
    1. Cavey
      Nope, not at all. You’re free to feel like beating anybody, sha don’t actually do it. What I suggest you do is to pull a Kanye and let your wife be Amber (I’m sure you’ve seen that pishure) and wink at the brother.
      Dassall ????
      4+
  • Dr tee
    Love the idea of getting her something ‘just because ‘… You see, I’m a gifts-person… If I see or think about anything that fits bae, I get it for him… Mustn’t be birthday or yearly anniversary… But what I don’t like is him getting me stuff because I got him something… Meaning if I don’t buy, he won’t buy… Not cool…

    Nice one .. Beginning to look forward to thy posts..

    #by the way… What do I do to get my article posted here on TNC…. Biko

    1+
    1. Cavey
      “Beginning to look forward to thy posts”
      Bless you, Dr. Tee ????
      Send your writeup to hello(at)thenakedconvos(dot)com ????????
      0
    2. SeryxMe
      If you’ve sent in submissions, the editors have to verify before getting them published. As long as your submission is acknowledged, you’ll have feedback on it sometime soon.
      0
  • anu
    I really wish my ex saw and read this well maybe we would still be together😔😔
    cavey you are slowly turning into my favorite TNC writer
    0
  • Ava Mosby
    What a boyfriend that is not into intimacy, gisting or even telling his girlfriend he loves her?? Not even trying to change either. What then should she do??
    0
  • Ava Mosby
    What about a boyfriend that is not into intimacy, gisting or even telling his girlfriend he loves her?? Not even trying to change either. What then should she do??
    0
    1. SeryxMe
      There might be ladies who don’t mind this kind of attitude. Some people aren’t naturally romantic do it’s understandable. But if you really care about these things, not just because Cavey wrote it, then you have to rethink the relationship.

      I still think though, that no matter how unromantic a person is, if you really care about someone, these things will come to you. So sometimes, it’s just that maybe the person does not care enough about you or is really not that into you.

      Relationship is about compromises. Intimacy, gisting often and saying ‘I love you’ are things that build it. If the guy is not willing to change to let these things happen, you’ll need to reconsider being is such a relationship.

      Bottomline, if what matters to you doesn’t matter to him, at best, you’ll be enduring the relationship for as long as it lasts. And that’s not good enough. Everyone deserves happiness in relationships.

      1+
  • Detox
    Great write up I do most of your advice, I think. But the ‘groupthink’ about relationships obviously has not been working. Girlfriends still complain about boyfriends, and vice versa. These things, as beautiful as they are, doesn’t keep relationships. I have a guy who did all these, he even skip UCL nights with the boys just to help loosen her hair and other petty things. But then, the girl ended up with a divorcee claiming my guy was too soft. I will never stop being sweet to my lady bcos of that experience, I’m more enlightened than that, these things just aren’t what keep relationships. All the ladies in support, will you go ahead and marry a dude who does all that but can’t make ends meet? These things are fine, I say again, but they are not the koko of the matter. They are just addons.
    3+
    1. Cavey
      Hello Detox,
      “Please note that following these rules does not guarantee for a successful relationship but I’m pretty sure they reduce the probability of a failed relationship.”

      Yes they might be ‘addons’ but aren’t addons part of the things that make something even more attractive/worthwhile?

      3+
  • adventure
    i swear i love you for this, treat her well and she would stay well unless she drinks kerosene as water or smoke sand, because truth is no girl with her normal brain would leave a guy who treats her well.. I believe in equality tho, treat me well and nigga you gotten a girl giving you all and making your happiness key, now adays you find people trying to hide feelings under “let it not be like na me love pass” i dont get it…why not love and not hold back… love is sweat unfortunately no boo in sight #sigh
    1+
  • Detox
    I understand bro. But please understand that I am in no way trying to refute your write up. I hope I will one day be able to write that good. What I am saying is, will you buy addons for an app you don’t know will work? Maybe I take relationships too seriously, but I think people go into it not knowing the real ‘why?’ behind their decision.
    2+
  • Dr. Baruu
    A simple “I love you” could make her day 20 times better so tell her a lot (she won’t get tired of hearing it)…

    Word. Baba, you words couldn’t be realer (sic)!

    0
  • woyi_oc
    “A simple “I love you” could make her day 20 times better so tell her a lot (she won’t get tired of hearing it)”

    Objection!! Telling her a lot is bad idea. Not saying not to tell her but…a LOT is a bad idea.

    “Not Mr. Macho-I-Have-Chest-Hair all the time…let her see your soft side.”

    emmmm….hm. Depends on how close we are or how much i trust her.

    “Don’t make her feel insecure about herself; tell her how beautiful she is as often as possible.”

    Again, everything in moderation :p

    “If she does something you’re uncomfortable with, tell her immediately! Don’t wait till you get into an argument because by then, it’s irrelevant.”

    This is good idea.

    “If you really love her, you’re going to change your ways to better yourself. Not because she tells you to but because you want to.”

    I want to form rebel but…man, if i love a female enough, I’ll automatically want to do all I can to secure our future together so. Well, the one time it happened that’s what i did so….i’ll assume i’m that kinda guy.

    “Put your bloody pride aside. It’s okay for your girl to want to pay for stuff once in a while.

    Let your girl spoil you! It doesn’t reduce your manhood. She’s just trying to show she appreciates you.”
    YES OH! WHICH NONSENSE PRIDE!! ABEG AWOOF NO DEY RUN BELE!! 😀

    “She’s going to have your back more than your guys will…”

    Ummmm….no. There’s absolutely no guarantee she will. Believing she will just sets one up for disappointment. If she’s got your back, cool. If not, no problem, you didn’t expect it. if your guys have really had your back for the many years you’ve known each other, man, i don’t see her superseding them in the back having department. Not unless shes suuuuupuuuuuuur into the guy. My cynicism is high level like that.

    “If you can’t cook, your sex game better be 100% and your tongue game 1000%.”

    What if I can’t cook and we are celibate? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

    1+
  • woyi_oc
    Also not making her feel insecure and telling her how beautiful she is feel like two entirely different stuff. I’m all for not stomping on her self esteem, by the way.

    If she’s beginning to add weight sha, i will tell her. 😀

    0
  • Stubborn geh
    A simple “I love you” could make her day 20 times better so tell her a lot (she won’t get tired of hearing it)”
    I agree with woyi on this one though. Personally, if you say too much it loses its “Ghenghen Ness” for lack of a better word.
    I hear you say and I’m like yea me too. A mindless chatter.
    Tell me everyday I don’t mind just don’t recite it to me.

    Girls don’t like it when you’re sentimental all the time. If she does something you don’t approve of or you don’t agree with something she suggested, tell her. You’d don’t have to agree with what she says all the time.
    I can’t even begin to tell you how much I love you for this. I can’t stand it cos it makes me believe you can’t advise me right. I become a control freak cos I believe I have to think for two.

    You won my heart when you talked about listening to your babe when she warns you about another chic. When we find out I was right all along, I don’t need to tell you’ve broken the trust in the relationship.

    You forgot to add every girl loves a confident (not arrogant) man. There’s nothing as reassuring as having a man who can have your back anywhere.

    1+
    1. Cavey
      “Tell me everyday just don’t recite it”
      *chuckle* I didn’t meant that as literally as the words come of as.
      I just meant say it enough times so she never has to wonder; actions are great and all but the words to are mighty important CC @woyi_oc
      Thank you jare , confidence IS sexy and very appealing. Guys, take note.
      0
  • BlackPearl
    Gosh! Can someone send this to my boyfriend! I’m tired of explaining some of this to him. Some of them he does well at sha but the others… I don tire of running mouth!
    1+
  • Morris
    A simple “I love you” could make her day 20 times better so tell her a lot (she won’t get tired of hearing it) – I do get tired tho.
    0
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