Why Independence Is Everything

Opinion

I am one lady who supports women independence and power, not that I have been in one of those bad relationships, no. OK! Maybe just a little. It saddens me to see women still being dependent. I salute this great Female Chief, Theresa Kachindamoto of Malawi who annulled 850 child marriages. These young girls were…

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I am one lady who supports women independence and power, not that I have been in one of those bad relationships, no. OK! Maybe just a little. It saddens me to see women still being dependent. I salute this great Female Chief, Theresa Kachindamoto of Malawi who annulled 850 child marriages. These young girls were sent back to school to continue with their education. If I had millions I would really be happy to support this good initiative.

This brings me back to my community of grown up ladies who are looking for ‘blessers’. My advice to you ‘BLESS YOURSELF’. How different are you from the helpless child who is sent to marry a wealthy man so that the family can benefit? Your beauty and other “assets” are powerful and precious. Unfortunately, they do not have any second chances.

I was talking to a colleague who had been stood up by her man. She was angry and said all sort of things. “I can buy my own car, it’s not like I can’t afford it,” she said. Her statement confused me because she chose to depend on his ride to work and back to the house. Yet here we are, looking at the time, every second. We get so angry at our partners for chasing success and we forget about the individuality part. Thing is, we tend to depend on our men most of the time like they are our Jesus. It gives me so much joy to achieve things on my own and celebrate them with my loved ones and support from my partner is also appreciated.

I do not understand why I have to wait for someone to pick me up or depend on them for even the little things like sanitary towels or bread. Another very good example is Olajumoke Orisaguna, the Nigerian Agege Bread seller now turned model. She is making thousands. I may not have followed the story very well but I noticed she had a husband, yet she decided to sell bread to support her family and not depend on the poor man. I have been preaching independency for some time now to my friends and I have been living every verse I preach when it comes to that.

So this is my experience. Once you make people feel that you depend on them for every little item, they feel they have so much power over you. You must have a plan as a lady and not appear desperate or needy. Be your own boss, know you got your own back before someone steps in. Be confident and believe every decision you take is right. People come into our lives for a reason and that reason is not to be blessers.

Can I get an amen?

Image via Her Campus

Responses

  1. Nedoux
    Hi Lincaya,

    Well said. Indeed, “Bless yourself”, pave your own path.

    For some reason “Sanitary towels and bread” in the same sentence reminds me of a time when we were too coy about periods and ish, so, “Blue bread” was the code name for sanitary towels. The Always plastic wrapper was bright blue. 🙂

    1. LincayaD Post author
      , i know right..we never used to talk about such here to. When i was little, mum would send me to the shop to buy sanitary towels, she would say “these are biscuits, imediately you buy, hide them and run straight home, do not talk to boys.” 🙂 now i know better lol.

      Some petty fights result from these things, hoping he noticed you ran out of salt and he would buy for you. Go to work and get your groove on lol

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