People Leave And It Is Okay

So I was walking home some nights ago and something had me sad and distracted but not distracted enough to not notice this puppy walking behind me. It took every turn with me probably it thought I was the owner. It had a collar around it’s neck and looked clean so it was surely not…

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So I was walking home some nights ago and something had me sad and distracted but not distracted enough to not notice this puppy walking behind me.

It took every turn with me probably it thought I was the owner. It had a collar around it’s neck and looked clean so it was surely not a street dog, it was just lost.

I tried walking faster but that was a dumb idea ’cause it would run if I seemed too far. At some point, I started laughing because it looked like we were playing a game, I would walk faster and it would wait a bit and then run to me.

After a while I started talking to the pup, of course it didn’t reply. I mean if it did I would be telling a different story entirely probably titled “How my villagers visited me all the way from Nigeria”

So I started talking to this pup and telling it why I was sad and how I felt alone and weirdly I felt better and when we were approaching my destination I thought about buying canned dog food in the store nearby and feeding it before going into the building but the coins I had on me were not enough so as we got to the entrance I turned and said my goodbyes but the pup looked like it didn’t understand what was going on.

From it’s reaction I could tell it was a trained pup because it just sat at the entrance probably thinking I would just get something inside and come out and we’ll continue our walk but it was a goodbye for me.

Few minutes later I came out and peeped through the hallway window and it was still there. It was now playing around with an empty water can. I felt bad but this was my stopping point, I was home now.

This pup walked with me when I felt alone and it even made me laugh and listened when I wanted to talk but I was home now.

The next day when  I came out, I didn’t see the pup around and all I felt was relief. I was certain it had moved on and probably found it’s owner and I wasn’t a bad person after all.

The point of all this story is….

People leave.

People leave and sometimes it’s not because they want to break your heart or tear down your world it’s just cause they have to. It’s time. They are home now. They aren’t “The One”

People leave and it’s not your fault.

People leave and there was nothing you could have done differently.

People leave and there’s no one to blame.

People come when you need them or they need you and they leave when they have to.

Expecting someone to stay because you stayed will only get you crushed. You might be home and they aren’t and they may be home and you aren’t and it’s a terrible thing to stay where you don’t belong. Sometimes they aren’t looking for a home. Maybe they are just nomads and it’s time to leave.

People leave. Cry if you have to. Wait if you must but baby, pick yourself up and find your home.

People leave.

You know, maybe it’s true what they say “Nothing good lasts forever” but I once heard my best friend say “A thing isn’t good because it lasts forever”

People leave.

And sometimes it’s not a bad thing.

Baby listen to me,

You are a castle with plenty of food and water

but I am a traveler. 

I am not looking for a home.

I only seek a cup of water and a place to rest for the night

and maybe if am lucky, a plate of food.

I am not here to stay please don’t serve me your heart.

– Amarion  

Responses

  1. Imaobong
    This is too beautiful.
    Thank you for this piece, I badly needed to hear this reminder again as I seem to be losing those I never imagined in my wildest dreams I would.
    Sometimes that’s just how it’s meant to be.
    You don’t need to hate them, you don’t need to try to forget them, the memories would always be yours to keep, the people just weren’t.
    Thank.You.
    2+
  2. Sapphire
    “Few minutes later I came out and peeped through the hallway window and it was still there. It was now playing around with an empty water can.”

    ……and this almost made me cry.

    1+
  3. Hanie
    If anything, this is what i need to accept in my life. People leave and its okay.
    Thank you! for people like me that get easily attached to things, its a bit difficult but all i need is to accept it.
    2+
  4. missc
    so I tried to time myself and I read it in about 2 mins (5mins read) I’m not sure why i did it, but I did. that aside, this is a beautiful read
    3+
    1. Amarion Ogara
      I think when you guard yourself so much, you miss out on the storyline. Some times it is not all about “happy endings” but the story.
      We can’t decide who stays or leaves all we can do is just love and there is something magical about loving and like I said a thing isn’t good because it lasts.
      2+
  5. Snow
    Nice read. It was beautiful i have to admit.

    But i can’t ignore that this post oversimplifies the issue.

    The pup didnt talk back, you could claim it hearwd you but did it understand your words? The pup didnt laugh with you or get sad when you were down and couldn’t gas you up. You met the pup in that night and left it that night.
    I have a dog and i admit i haven’t been the best of owner in the past few months, yet everytime i walk past its cage, the dog comes out, chained, tail wagging, staring at me until i was out of sight. And on days where i decided to play, i could practically feel the dog’s happiness.
    Now if it was just a random pup i happen to feed or play with and then left alone, it would move on because there was never a relationship or bonding.

    Toolsman said not to have any regrets and i agree. But not having regrets doesn’t justify events as okay.

    People Leave. But is it always okay?

    There are various dynamics that can play into this happening and when you factor in our individual experiences, emotions, psychological and environment, then the waters become murky. And it isn’t always about romantic relationships, i may never bat an eyelid over 100 people leaving but one person may do so and i’ll find myself seriously derailed.

    I may wake up tomorrow and have someone leave; maybe they move to another continent and contact was lost, or they died, or we had irreconcilable differences or they left for no reason you could think of.

    You are allowed to cry and mourn and wail, but eventually over a period of time, you are gonna be okay (it’s inevitable) but just because you got over them does not make it okay.

    People Leave. And it is okay (in theory. As a concept). But add personal experiences, emotions and psychology into the mix and it does no seem so simple anymore

    3+
  6. CandidHassey
    This is true. Sometimes people come into your life just to play a role. To teach you humility, to teach you to love, to help you laugh during a difficult time, to show you true friendship, to make you experience hardship etc. But then after that, they leave. We may never understand why they left or why they came in in the first place if they were going to leave. But if we think deeply, they have impacted something in our lives. Whether positive or negative. They have played their role.
    1+
  7. Miss A
    Oh this is beautiful..fave lines are

    I only seek a cup of water and a place to rest for the night

    and maybe if am lucky, a plate of food.

    I am not here to stay please don’t serve me your heart.

    This article has really shed light on somethings i am going through now..especially with the illustration about the dog..

    God bless you for this

    1+
  8. Zee
    Its not only about the fact that they leave. It’s how they leave. Some people leave you with a gaping hole in your chest. Some leave you with so many unanswered questions. Some leave even when they say they won’t. Some leave you broken and battered. Some leave you lost.
    1+
  9. Melissa
    Good points about letting people leave, could have been told without the dog story, totally unrelated and serves no direct purpose .
    As she said, the dog was probably lost, and needed help getting back to it’s owner, nothing more, nothing less. She could have helped it do that out of generosity for the dog, esp as it was night time?, but she didn’t. She used the dog as catharsis and when she was done, went into her home. But well….. since we are on the dog story then in that case, people leaving is fine… it’s not about the leaving, it’s about HOW they leave. What they did, or could have done, or should have done, the closure….. before leaving. People who don’t leave on good/right terms, or who don’t close the “book” well or at all (amicably, caringly, respectfully, generously, kindly) tend to leave things to assumption… that “oh she/he will be alright” – never actually checking to verify their assumption that the person is emotionally alright…. and safe. And that if they are not alright, being caring enough for the person’s emotional wellbeing at the very least by providing closure, and then bidding farewell.

    So yes, people leave, and that is perfectly fine….. but HOW they leave is the real topic/question.

    Closure is very important, I’d go as far as saying it is a fundamental human (psychological) desire – when people care, they want, need and give closure. The same way we desire to get to the very end of an interesting book we are reading, we desperately want to know how it will end, and when we have read the very last line and word, we are satisfied, we close the book. We may like the ending, we may not. We may want more still. We may have loved the book, we may miss it, it occupied us mentally/emotionally…. but the end is the end. We got to know the end. We move on to another book.

    Care/caring, that’s the keyword.
    She didn’t care about the dog. Whether she is a good or bad person isn’t mine to say.

    Final words, it’s not about leaving, leaving is fine, clearly, it’s about how we leave, how we treat each other.

    xo

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