Hey people. Toolman here again. Yeah, it’s Men’s Month so you’re going to get tired of reading that at some point. Live with it.
So, BOOBS yeah? Only five days into Men’s month and we are already on this, makes me wonder what we’re going to talk about the other days of the month. Anyway, we have the Awesome SINS OF THE FATHER series starting next week and again I say, trust me, it’s going to be all kinds of amazing so don’t miss it.
Today’s dialogue is a bit of a lot of things. There’s a little bit of a rant, some of my personal opinions, a theory and then the dialogue. So… lets get into it.
WARNING: Some women may find this post uninteresting.
A couple of weeks ago, the Internet went crazy with the news of Angeline Jolie-Pitt getting a double mastectomy as a way of preventing breast cancer. News sites, entertainment blogs, health and fitness blogs, sports and event politics blogs all went crazy and put up all kinds of posts/stories on the news. Most of them were off course centred on how brave Mrs. Pitt is while others decided to focus on “Mr. Jolie-Pitt” and how much of a supporting figure he is to his wife and family. Excellent right? I mean, even the Grinch couldn’t rain on that parade. But y’all know me and my erm… “interesting” way of looking at things.
Fret not, I’m not going to attack Mrs. Pitt in any way. All that news just got me thinking and wondering about the average Nigerian man, his love for the female mammary organs and also women’s perception of the Nigerian man’s views on … boobs. I held on to that thought and didn’t really follow up on it until I was catching up with all the weekend action on Big Brother Africa and I came across an “interesting” video of a shower scene of one of female housemates.
Hey, calm your titties.
I’m sure all the guys reading already know the housemate I’m talking about but just incase you are @Otoxic you’ve been living under a rock, the video was that of Annabel, one of the Kenyan housemates. Now for those who haven’t been following BBA, here’s what Annabel looks like.
TRUST ME, this picture doesn’t do her boobs justice. I mean, the first day she took off her top to get in the jacuzzi, I think I heard Big Brother himself cough or something. So, to put things in context, I watched the video and proceeded to tweet:
That right there should be her full name but before I stray too far from the point of this post, so I watched this clip and I’m sure regulars here know that I’m not exactly a “boobs-man”. I really don’t know what it is but anytime I see a woman with higher D-class boobs and above all I imagine is a picture of her in ten, fifteen years when her babies would have a daily battle with gravity and her forces (yes I know smaller boobs sag too but we are talking statistics here). But that’s me and my problem right? Like why can’t I just live in the moment and appreciate the present value of the damn bazoomas.
So, Annabella Balloona got me thinking again about Mrs. Pitt and wondering how many Nigerian men would support what she did. If that ever came up, I imagined this kind of conversation between a married couple:
A: Hey baby, so I’ve been thinking about getting a DOUBLE mastectomy
B: Huh? Why? Is everything ok?
A: LOL. Yes now, but you see we have history of breast cancer in my family so…
B: erm.. so you’ve not been diagnosed of anything abi?
A: No I haven’t but..
B: But nothing, can we go into the room, all this talk about boobs has gotten me erm.. you know :D
Ok, I kid. I kid. But after this, it occurred to me that judging by how much women fuss about boobs and how much they think it controls and influences men, the average Nigerian woman may not even come up with this suggestion in the first place. Sure, she can get a boob job done right after the procedure and it’ll look like nothing happened but I’m pretty sure that if the boob job wont enhance what she already has, chances are she’ll rather live with that risk. But this is me just thinking, that is why I have you guys.
Today I want you to share your thoughts on boobs. Yes, boobs, kegs, jugs, bazoomas, titties, love balloons, courage, breasticles, whatever you call them. For the guys, are boobs really really that important? If you could have a Kim K with A-cups, would you refuse her? And for the ladies, why are y’all boobs crazy? Yes, sometimes, I think women even fuss about boobs more than guys. Finally, in the scenario I painted above, how would you react as Mrs. A or Mr. B? You know the drill; use the comment box to express you. Cheers.