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THE FIRST TIME WE… HAD SEX

First time

“The Best Laid Plans”

by @Janus_Aneni

_____

My name is Biola. Abiola Alexander Akinwunmi. My father must have been very proud that day at the naming ceremony. Sitting beside me on the bed, pretending to study her face in bedside mirror is my wife, Bisi. The very recent, Mrs Adebisi Agatha Akinwunmi. My father would be proud of her too, his soul rest in peace. I got married this morning see. Beautiful celebration, awesome sermon, which I heard none of, but which everyone concurs, and I had eight hundred people at my reception according to George, our wedding planner. Which is sad, according to Bisi because, it means we will get at most thirty gifts. But it’s good, I’m happy. I’m married to the girl of my dreams.

During the reception, while everyone was still drinking and screaming ‘Igwe e!’, I grabbed Bisi and snuck out. I had arranged with Pastor Tim, my bestman, for my car to be waiting for me in the car park, so it was a simple matter of jumping in and zooming off, alone, to our honeymoon. You see, I’m a very romantic guy; I had a plan for my wife. None of that whole, family crowded in your house something, we were going to be alone tonight. And besides, my reservation at Hotel Senatorial, PHC, cannot waste.

Anyway, we got stuck in Aba road traffic for almost two hours. It was crazy.

Let me tell you the plan. After sneaking out the reception, and getting to the hotel in less than twenty minutes, Mr and Mrs Akinwunmi step out of their car, him in his three piece suit, jacket slung over his shoulder, and a grin wide enough to span the Suez canal on his face. She, still in her wedding gown, glitter all over her face, a shy blush on her cheeks, and the ultimate sultry look in her eye.

“Mr and Mrs Akinwunmi for room 307 please.”

Then we will giggle up the elevator, hot nervous kisses all the way, to our room, pre-scented, as per order, with red scented candles, complimentary champagne and a soft, soft, very inviting, definitely sexual bed.

The best laid plans of men and mice.

For some reason completely beyond my understanding and totally blamed on my grandmother’s village, one of those APC people booked the entire third floor, our reservations got mixed up in the shuffle and suddenly we had no rooms. Na so bros reach desk dey talk, concierge dey look am like say e craze. By the time we finished clearing up the muddle, and paying for newer, more expensive rooms, it was 10pm. We were tired, embarrassed and everyone kept giving us pitying looks.

“Eh ya. See them, no money to pay. And dey be wan do honeymoon”

Bisi, had gotten pissed somewhere between unhelpful concierge and a British contractor and guest at the hotel who thought she was “surely, such a beautiful jungle beauty”. And suddenly, I think, everyone knew we were a Yoruba couple. Me? I just kept hoping none of my church members saw us.

So here we are, in an unscented room, half in the dark, staring at the TV watching a Senator scream. I wish someone would shoot him. Bisi isn’t even saying anything, which is quite surprising. Since we entered the room, the foolish bellboy still waiting for tip, it’s been the silent treatment of life. It’s my wedding night, and I’m not finding it funny. She just entered, dropped her clutch-bag on the mantel beside the TV and walked, straight into the bathroom, unzipping her gown on the way. The thin white panties she had underneath were lace, and barely covered anything. Behind, her bottom jigged and swayed, black mounds that reached into me and started a stir. I took off my shirt. My wife, has a very smoothly shaped behind I tell you.

We just showered separately, and came back to lie down.

“You should have confirmed the reservations before we left the reception.” Aha! I was waiting for it.

Bisi is one year older than I am; a fact few of our friends know about, and somehow feels it’s her birthright to admonish all of my failings. She’s often right, but no less galling. Nevertheless though, she’s never steered us wrong and that’s one of the things I love about her. But honestly if GOD had not spoken ehn?

“And the traffic jam,” I reply goading her on.

“You should have asked someone on Twitter or something. Shebi if we passed through GRA we will have…”

Ah..what did I tell you?

“Come here jor, you too complain sef,” I tease as I pull her closer with my left arm. She is wearing nothing underneath the duvet, our clothes, and those lace panties, having been divested on the floor, and my hand slips over her breast, the nipple hardening instantly. I reach with my other arm and bring her even closer, my hands running down her back and over her bum. A thrill runs through me and unconsciously, I have a sharp intake of breath. Bisi pretends to struggle, but soon she relaxes against my chest. Her leg runs up my thigh bringing my knee close to her centre, which is beginning to get very warm. I turn and stare at the TV. I see nothing. My hand is still on her bum, but it has gone numb long ago. The never before feel of her naked body against mine is too exciting and I don’t know what to do next.

I have never had sex with my wife before. I have never had sex before. Suddenly, the promise I made so many years ago doesn’t make much sense. I feel inadequate, inexperienced, like she might laugh at any second. It’s not like I don’t know what to do; it’s just; what if I don’t do well. I know Bisi had a boyfriend before she met me, so, what if I don’t measure up. These thoughts run through my head, speeding around and around, while I just stare at the TV, my ardor melting into hopelessness.
Bisi runs her hand over my chest, her fingers making tiny circles around my nipples, and turning my face to hers says, “I love you Mr Akinwunmi, and I’m very happy we’re married.” Then she kisses me.

But this woman sha!

Outside, a low growl in the cloudy skies to the East, but over Port Harcourt city, the stars shine down, twinkling radiance mirroring the argon lights that blaze through the town. A light mist rolls in from the coast, sweeping over the ground in light brushes. A long caress over low hills and steepled mounds, flick flick at the wet portions.

I kiss her back, light, then deeply, pulling her closer as I reach for more pleasure, her body crushed against mine. My hand runs over her breast, kneading the soft mound slowly as I squeeze her nipple between my fingers. Bisi runs her hands down my back, her long nails tracing thin scratches that should hurt, but only excite me further. My back arches as I grind my pelvis into hers, my hands going over to cup her round buttocks. She climbs on top of me, and kisses my neck, her wet tongue flicking across my chest, till she takes my nipple in her warm mouth. I let out a low moan. Already, her centre drips with desire, and I can feel the wet against the stiffness which threatens to explode me. Flipping her over with a strength I didn’t know I possess, I pin her arms down as I bend over her neck. I bite softly, letting my tongue linger on her neck. Going lower, I lick across her nipples slowly, first the left, then the right, then take it into my mouth, sucking. As I lean above her, my penis brushes against the folds of her centre, the sensation is total, and for a second I barely breathe. I lean back and forth, letting my hardness play along the soft furriness. Bisi rocks against me, her eyes closed, chest heaving in undulating rhythms.

There is only one thing left to do.

“In! Inside now!” she cries.

I pause. I know what to do, but suddenly…

Bisi opens her eyes and I search them for the disappointment I expect to see. Instead, all I see is love suffused with desire, and understanding. She smiles.

“Relax,” she says, her legs still parted, hands reaching upward for me.

But, I have to ask. The question has always been there, snug at the back of my mind.

“Adebisi, is it…have you ever…?” the words are hard to find.

“No, it isn’t. I have. I’m not a virgin. It was before you of course. But now, and always, I’m yours forever,” she replies, her fingers clasped over my shaft, pulling me closer.

Bro, that’s all I needed to know.

****

The First Time…We special is proudly sponsored by SureGifts.com.ng

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Comments
  • Avatar
    hannymok

    First?

    February 11, 2014
    • Avatar
      larz

      well done. u deserve every single drop of your chapman

      February 11, 2014
    • Avatar
      thetoolsman

      <[_] chapman for you…

      February 11, 2014
  • Avatar

    Urrgh 2nd really?!

    February 11, 2014
  • Avatar
    immortalteddybear

    Hmm i like d perspective. Virgin guy. Usually its the girl thats the virgin. Well written

    February 11, 2014
    • Avatar
      @Sirkastiq

      Ewo tun ni perspective oga immortal? LOL

      February 12, 2014
  • Avatar

    Bleh ;(

    February 11, 2014
  • Avatar
    justice

    There is only one thing left to do.*In Jayz’s voice*

    February 11, 2014
  • Avatar
    amala pupa

    Eeyah…

    February 11, 2014
  • Avatar
    niro

    Lol. Janus really? Was that all you needed to know?

    February 11, 2014
  • Avatar
    chaka khan

    Hmmmmm………..I love the nipple part!

    February 11, 2014
    • Avatar

      Lol. You sound like a vir…

      Wait. You know what? Nvm…

      February 11, 2014
      • Avatar

        bwahahahahahahahaha!!!

        February 11, 2014
      • Avatar
        @Sirkastiq

        LMAOOOOOOOO..takes one to know o..nvm

        February 12, 2014
        • Avatar
          ijebuPrincess

          abi o!

          February 13, 2014
    • Avatar
      janusaneni

      LOOOOOL!

      February 11, 2014
  • Avatar
    KRO

    Pretty cool story. The virgin groom and his experienced wife.

    February 11, 2014
  • Avatar
    KayShawy

    He seems to know a lil too much for a virgin tho…but well written still 🙂

    February 11, 2014
  • Avatar
    jinxchrys

    I liked that it was a 'wedding night' plot. But really tho, he's just rememberingto ask about her being with someone else? Right in the thick of things?

    February 11, 2014
    • Avatar
      Nolly

      Buhahahahahah! I guess Its cos he's a virgin…LOL and yea I love the wedding night plot too…

      February 11, 2014
    • Avatar
      @Sirkastiq

      "thick of things" ehn? Porn intended?

      February 12, 2014
    • Avatar
      ijebuPrincess

      I thot so too o. I don't think any man will wait until then, virgin or not.

      February 13, 2014
  • Avatar
    Mr Xavier IGHORODJE

    Well done Aljanus.. well crafted

    February 11, 2014
  • Avatar
    Mimsy

    Virgin Pastor. Lol.
    Nice.

    February 11, 2014
  • Avatar
    Fierc3

    Only thing missing is the condom, no?

    February 11, 2014
    • Avatar

      it's their wedding night…. i would hope they have gotten the necessary tests done before getting married and maybe they have no problem with her getting preggers immediately.

      February 11, 2014
  • Avatar
    Fierc3

    Yes ofcourse skin is the way with the hubby, just didn't think theyd want to get pregnant immediately

    February 11, 2014
  • Avatar
    edgothboy

    El oh el. Wedding night bants. thanks Janus for reminding us why this called the 'naked' convos.

    February 12, 2014
  • Avatar
    Chisom.

    I love this.

    February 12, 2014
  • Avatar

    LOOOL! Thanks you guys for the comments..

    February 12, 2014
  • Avatar
    dorothy

    The virgin groom n his experienced bride. Hmmmm, quite a catch. So, did it happen? Cos you wrote that he said this was how it was supposed to happen…. So, did it?

    February 12, 2014
  • Avatar
    @Sirkastiq

    I can see Toks taking notes…

    February 12, 2014
    • Avatar
      janusaneni

      LOOOOL!

      February 12, 2014
    • Avatar
      kophojomo

      LMAO

      February 12, 2014
    • Avatar

      Goat.

      February 13, 2014
  • Avatar

    Is "Janus" Jibola?

    February 12, 2014
    • Avatar

      Jibola ke?

      February 12, 2014
      • Avatar
        immortalteddybear

        Tears

        December 4, 2014
  • Avatar
    kophojomo

    Wedding nights are a wealth of tales…all the awkwardness of life

    February 12, 2014
  • Avatar
    Chinedov

    Can't wait for mine. I mean, the other way round. No, I'm not a virgin.

    February 13, 2014
  • Avatar
    MsBraimah

    Virgin groom…myth… lol I can imagine the stress getting their room… terrible

    February 13, 2014
    • Avatar

      Honeymoon Myths

      “Vrgin groom” – half a myth, “virgin groom and experienced bride” – two-thirds of a myth … “Virgin groom oblivious to bride’s virginity”- Absolute myth.

      February 18, 2014
  • Avatar
    musingsofagidimallam

    Lerrus just say you've written my own wedding night, hopefully excluding the embarrassment and traffic. Great job.

    February 14, 2014
  • Avatar

    Beautifully written

    February 15, 2014
  • Avatar
    Joy Nteh

    I go marry o.

    February 17, 2014
  • Avatar
    oluwadunni

    Felt like I was reading a Harlequin novel, great stuff!

    February 18, 2014
  • Avatar
    avrilng

    How are you oblivious to your wife's 'un-virginity'? Are you a dopemu? Una no gist reach that side? Next thing now is 'oh, no its not my first pregnancy. I had a child for my daddy's landlord'

    February 18, 2014
    • Avatar
      janusaneni

      LMAOOOOOO..HOW AM I JUST SEEING THIS? Daddy's Landlord. .hehehe..smh. you people

      January 2, 2015
  • Avatar
    Ttm

    I love this

    February 1, 2016
  • Avatar
    ba

    It is possible, till I had a medical emergency my fiance didn’t know I wasn’t a virgin. We never spoke sbout it. My experience is also like an inexperience because those days it was very painful and by the time I started enjoying it I broke up with my then boyfriend and became sexually celibate – 6 yrs and counting.

    August 17, 2017
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