14th of December, 2011
15minutes after 3 o’clock in the afternoon
It’s ten days before Christmas and I’m excited! I love Christmas. Mostly because it means that we get to make our hair pretty and dress up in our new clothes and shoes. Of course that’s after we find them. You see mummy and daddy like to hide our new stuff in different places in the living room. Once its midnight, we all come out shouting merry Christmas and after everyone has hugged everyone, we go searching! I’m usually the first to find mine before Ebuka. Ebuka is my kid brother. It’s not like he’s slow or anything but he’s still kind of a baby so I have to help him out. He’s just 3 years old. Anyway, back to Christmas. I also love all the food! Mummy usually allows me to help her out a little because I’m five and eight months (that’s almost six years old) so I’m a big girl. Everyone says I’m really brilliant and don’t act or talk my age. But I don’t know if she will let me help her this year. I don’t even know if we will cook. Mummy is sad. I know this because she is always crying. Ever since daddy travelled last three weeks. At first I thought she was just missing daddy but now I don’t know again. This is not the first time daddy is travelling. I miss him too but I don’t cry. At least not all the time. Aunty Ify even had to come over to stay with us for a while but she’s gone now. She left this morning. You remember Aunty Ify? That daddy’s sister that I don’t like very much because she’s always making me wash plates? Yes, that one. She couldn’t make mummy happy. Only daddy can I think. I just wish he would come home. Yesterday I went to meet mummy to ask her for daddy’s phone number where he is so I could call him. I would tell him off first for not calling me since before asking him to hurry and come home because mummy really misses him this time. But I couldn’t get the number because mummy started crying again and aunty Ify chased me out. I don’t know what to do. We haven’t even decorated the tree yet! Daddy and Eddy and me are usually the ones who do most of the work while mummy just sits and gives instructions. Ebuka plays with the shiny balls. So it’s really me and daddy’s thing. Last year, he even carried me on his neck so that I could hang the star at the top. When I turned back and said “Look mummy, I did it!” she had this huge smile on her face. Maybe if I put up the tree it will cheer her up? Daddy promised to be back on time for us to put it up together. If I do it alone, he may feel bad that I did it without him. But mummy is really sad. I’m sure if I tell him that I did it to make mummy happy he won’t feel bad. Okay, let me go and ask Abigail to help me.
20minutes after 8 o’clock in the night
It didn’t work. I think I even made it worse. When I turned back from Abigail’s neck after placing the star, mummy was on the floor, holding her tummy with one hand and covering her mouth with the other. And she was crying. I started crying too. I came down and ran to her but she pushed me away and ran up to her room. This doesn’t feel like Christmas at all dear diary. Tomorrow I will ask Abigail to carry me again so that I can remove the star and replace it with that decoration that is shaped like a teardrop. Now I feel like crying again. Goodnight.
15th of December, 2011
10 o’clock on the dot in the morning
Daddy is back! But I haven’t had a chance to scold him or climb on his back yet. I didn’t see him when he came in but he’s sleeping now. I think he’s really tired because it’s been quite a while now and he’s still sleeping. . Everytime I try to get close to him so I can wake him up just for a little bit, someone pushes me back. Hmph. I don’t even know why he is sleeping downstairs and not in his room. I guess I just have to wait for him to wake up. There are so many people downstairs. I think they are here to welcome him. Mummy doesn’t seem happy though. This is strange. I thought she would be happy to see daddy but instead she’s just sitting with those people looking sad. Well at least she’s not crying anymore so that’s good I guess. And they are all wearing black. Hmmm. I feel like something isn’t right but I don’t know what it is. Why isn’t daddy sleeping in his room? I’m going back downstairs.
“Mummy, mummy, why are all these people here? And why is daddy sleeping in that box on the table?”
They say that daddy has gone to be with Jesus. I don’t understand this because he is sleeping in that brown box. They keep saying things about spirits and bodies and… I don’t understand. I’m really scared now.
In the middle of the night
I CANNOT SLEEP
16th of December, 2011
35minutes after 7 o’clock in the morning
I’m going to write a letter to Jesus and ask Abigail to help me send it.
Happy birthday! I hope your mummy got you a cake? I am sending you this letter with my book of magic spells. It was one of daddy’s presents to me last Christmas but you can have it as a birthday present just make sure you don’t tell him ok? Are you having a birthday party? Is that why my daddy is with you? Or did he just visit you because no one else wanted to visit you on your birthday? Its okay, I’m not mad at you. I promise I’m not. It’s just that mummy and ebuka and me really really miss him and would like to spend Christmas with him. I’ve never spent Christmas without him. So I’m thinking that we could come for your party too? Or just to visit you? That way, we can all have Christmas together! I think it’ll be a lot of fun, don’t you? I have to go now, I need to pee. But please write back quickly with directions to where you live so that me, mummy and ebuka can come. Please. My heart is paining me and I think that only daddy can make it betterL. Thank you. And happy birthday again.
P.S_ Don’t tell daddy we’re coming okay? So that it will be a surprise 🙂
My gift to the next writer is the Christmas tree ornament shaped in the form of a teardrop that Ella wanted to replace the star st the top of the tree with. This one is for anyone who’s ever had the ‘merry’ in their Christmas taken away from them.
And to everyone, may this Christmas not be as bleak as Ella’s but filled with magical surprises that will make you smile. Have a very merry Christmas people!