Why I Unfollowed You – To What Extent Should Social Media Influence Relationship Decisions?

Ladies and gentlemen of TNC, welcome to another edition of Wednesday Dialogue proudly sponsored by www.madamkarakata.com. If you haven’t checked out the site and bought something nice for yourself or the boo, what are you waiting for? I have an interesting topic to discuss today so let’s get into it. **** Let’s start off with…

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Ladies and gentlemen of TNC, welcome to another edition of Wednesday Dialogue proudly sponsored by www.madamkarakata.com. If you haven’t checked out the site and bought something nice for yourself or the boo, what are you waiting for? I have an interesting topic to discuss today so let’s get into it.

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Let’s start off with a little background (please bear with me). Some weeks ago, I met up with a friend who runs a fashion label. He had been trying for long to convince me to make some traditional outfits with him and on this particular day, he succeeded in convincing me. However, I told him there was a certain design I had seen somewhere I wanted him to replicate on one of the outfits. So I proceeded to pickup my phone and navigated to the Instagram account of one of my other friends where I had seen the said outfit. The picture was one of her and ‘le boo’ all cozied-up at some event and he had on this really neat trad outfit.

After spending a few minutes searching through her timeline, it suddenly hit me – the said picture was gone. Vanished. Deleted.  I quickly hid my surprise and dismissed my designer friend. Later that day, I took time to look through my friend’s timeline and it was only then it occurred to me that every single picture of ‘le boo’ had been deleted from her account. Now I’m sure most of us reading understand what this means and it probably is no big deal to you as well but in my world, it’s a major deal. And no, I’m not talking about the fact that my friend had probably broken up with her boo. Nope, I’m talking about her decision to delete all his pictures off her Instagram page. Why is this even post worthy? I’m still the Toolsman no? Today, I want to throw up some questions and I hope at the end of our dialogue you’d have helped me find answers to those questions.

I’m one who never ever regrets. I learned at a very young age that every single thing in this life happens for a reason (no, I didn’t learn this from church – life taught me). Everyone you meet, every encounter you have, every success or failure happens for a reason – I know it sounds clichéd and all but if you are true to yourself, spend some time really meditating on things from your past and you’ll probably realize what I mean. But this isn’t some inspirational post so let’s side step that. My decision never to regret things but instead try to see what piece of my life’s puzzle they are, helped me to see failures in my past relationships not as failures but more like learning curves.

Today, I can proudly stand before y’all and say I’m still friends with every single one of my exes – and no, I’m not talking just being civil, neither are we best friends who talk to each other every day. I still love my life yanah.  But at least I know I’ve gotten some super referrals from exes and I’ve also helped some without expecting anything in return and so on. I’m not asking for a medal, surely I’m not the only guy who has this kind of relationship with his exes even though others may have found themselves there accidentally or really do it for their ulterior motives. My point is this, if after leaving these relationships, I dwelled on the failure and let myself slip into regret, would I have ever been able to benefit from knowing any of my exes?

I’m no saint. I’ve hurt people and I’ve also been hurt so it’s definitely not a matter of speaking from a position of no experience. In fact, during my feature on Moments with Mo, I spoke publicly for the first time about how I found out an ex was cheating on Facebook. I know she might be reading this now and I’m sure she can vouch that I didn’t go from there to ‘unfriend’ her on Facebook after I found out. Yes, there was no Instagram back then but even though we ended the relationship eventually, I didn’t delete her numbers from my phone, I didn’t try to erase her from my life and lie to myself that what we had never happened. Sure, I kept my distance for a while, I’m a very disciplined person but too many times, I found myself calling her when I didn’t need to but deep down, I knew the solution to that wasn’t deleting her number because I could always get it if I wanted to. The best way to conquer your fear is to face it head on no?

I found out the friend I spoke about at the beginning of the post broke up with her boyfriend and in less than two weeks she deleted all of his pictures from Instagram, Facebook etc. She unfollowed him on every possible social media site, deleted all his numbers and literally tried to erase every record of him in her life. When I eventually spoke to her, I only asked one question – Did you rip out your heart too? Of course she couldn’t answer that question because deep down she knew she was only deceiving herself.

I’m sure most of us have seen that viral internet video titled “Look up”. The one that shows us just how much of our lives we give to social media and electronic devices. Maybe I’m digressing a bit but truth is, a lot of us nowadays have made ourselves believe social media and digital things have some form of influence or the other on our emotions. Also, we’ve become so much of cowards that rather than facing our fears, we decide to run, hiding behind technology. Some think their relationships are not ‘legit’ till their partner changes their Facebook relationship status to show “in a relationship with XXX“. Others believe they aren’t important in your life if you haven’t use their picture for a #MCM or #WCW post? And the quickest way to know two people are no longer together is when you notice they’ve gone ahead to delete pictures from their social media accounts. It has created the illusion that you can ‘Win Your Break-Up’ by deleting things and pushing buttons but as this hilarious video below demonstrates… sometimes that has more to do with hurting them than helping you heal.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying you shouldn’t delete pictures. No, I’m not some kind of perv. Also, what kind of message would you be sending to your new boo if pictures of you cozying up with your ex are still on your Instagram timeline. My point is, do you have to delete every single picture? And do you have to do it immediately sh*t hits the fan? No matter how hard we try, we can NEVER EVER erase the past. The moment you embrace your past, learn whatever lessons you were supposed to learn from it and use that to make your future relationships better, that in my opinion is the real moment of victory. I’m not saying it’s easy but in this world of 6-degrees of separation, I think that’s a better plan than simply deleting pictures.

We are not all the same and certainly not everyone can be like me but today I want to read your views on this topic. To what extent should Social Media influence our relationship decisions? Have you ever been heartbroken? How did you manage your emotions with respect to your activities on social media sites? Did your actions help make you feel better? After reading this post are you going to do things differently from now on? Use the comment box to express you.

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Responses

    1. intelcentral
      Lol….not allowed joor! Meanwhile toolsman, can links on this page be made to open up in a new tab when clicked instead?
        1. sircastiq
          Please do not do that. You can control+click on PCs and hold down the link for a menu on mobile devices. UIs shouldn't act in unexpected ways.
  1. poisefreak
    Sigh…. Have you ever been "erased" from all social media networks by someone who dumped you over the phone? No? Lol, then you dunno what pain is… It is somewhat childish to do that though, but sometimes it's necessary.

    There are some people you love so much that the pain of losing them makes you want to stay away from them for good. its akin to chopping off your limb so a bacterial infection won't spread; you love your leg, but to save yourself you gotta let it go. I personally shut such people out forever as soon as I am over them because there is no use trying to stay relevant to someone who feels it was a mistake ever being with you. Stick to Hi's and Bye's with exes….everybody wins.

    1. thetoolsman Post author
      Lol.. of course Ive been erased. Like I said, we all can't be Toolsman. one of my exes did try to erase me but I made her realize her mistake and we were able to get past it.
      1. poisefreak
        I must say that the fact that a man I loved erased me from all social networks (we met on one) after dumping me for another (Lightskinned, older) woman almost ruined my self esteem…. I cried for months, I have become very different from who I used to be now. I find it difficult to feel anything real for anyone and I just want to hurt people most times… I even deactivated my twitter because of the adverse effects of that breakup. Some females are demonic, they don't think its wrong to hurt others to be happy… they prey on men's weaknesses and use it to taunt you when they have gotten what they set out to get… they even monitor you on social media to see if you have broken down completely after taking your man from you.

        Nah… it is unhealthy to keep somw exes close… very unhealthy.

        1. thetoolsman Post author
          Sigh.. truth is, Ive also been out of relationships that made me question my person. It's hard, I know that but I'll go back to something I said in the post, you may not realize it now, heck, it might take years before you do if you dont take out time to really think about it but one day, some day, you'll understand why you had to go through what you did with that guy and at that point, if you're true to yourself, you'd appreciate the experience. The decision to learn that reason now or much later is up to you.
          1. poisefreak
            Hmm… Hopefully I'll learn; right now I am watching myself become something else… it hurts. Thanks for the post. 🙂
          2. DannyK
            If you don't learn something from an experience, it will be repeated – said a wise man .

  2. intelcentral
    Like Toolsman, I try to remain friends with exes. I love social media and all its benefits but there's a reason its called social and not private….. No need putting up stuff today that you would have to worry about taking down tomorrow! Life is simple, we just tend to make it complicated for reasons unknown.
  3. poisefreak
    Meanwhile I was tempted to share my social media experience on here… but opening old wounds won't help. Just know Twitter is a dangerous place to flaunt a relationship, I sure do know what it feels like to lose a good relationship on Twitter and get taunted by the new iyawo.. lol.. Sad place.
      1. poisefreak
        Like yorubas would say "talk would finish in the house of the talker" lol…Literally. Took me a year and a half to get over this one, still reflect on it sometimes, bad experience, over it…. Nothing is new under the sun; there are some people you just need to let go jare. Life would make it easy for y'all never to cross paths.
  4. tolu
    Well…the answer to your questions lie in your write up. First, people are different and deal with issues differently. I also believe everyone you meet in kife is somehow relevant to what you become , the issue however is not everyone matures to the level of viewing relationships for what they really are : a chance to learn and grow. Secondly, I fond it funny when people say people let social media get in the way of relatuonships..begs the question 'what is social media?" . It is a sum total of our psychology ; Narcissism, Egocentrism, insecurities, self esteem..it is our thoughtsand actions just put out for the world to see, and what heightens cconsciousness more than being in the public eye? We are who we, social media is just an outlet, or a window if you want. So…I vote for dealing with old relationships with tact , you need not delete all old pictures (except they haunt you or now look so ugly) ..but we know people will always deal with things in the best way they know. "You are your thoughts".
  5. Twinkle
    The best way to get over someone for me is breaking all communications. Broke up recently with the person I thought was THE. ONE because he’s in love with another. How do you keep communication with that kind of person? I deleted him off all social media and all. I still check up on his TL day by day but not keeping in touch makes my recovery process faster. **I am so thirsty can I get chilled apu jews please**
    1. thetoolsman Post author
      I still disagree with you. You deleted him but still check on his TL – who are you deceiving really? This is a special post so I'll serve you some of the chapman I won for commenting first <[_]. Now lets tell ourselves the truth, has cutting off communication from him really helped you?
      1. DannyK
        Cutting off sure does help…ALOT!

        Yes, one might still go on the person's TL to stalk…but someday, just someday you'll find yourself not doing so. At least you are in control of how often you get updated of this person's life.

        Every little strategy helps :/

  6. MrOnafuye
    Hey poisefreak.
    It wasn't a good relationship if he let her taunt you.am I glad you are out of it?Yes!
    Twitter isn't a good place for a lot of things.you just need to know what they are.
    dont know you but m sincerely happy for you.
  7. Twinkle
    If I am true to myself, deleting him is not helping issues. But I’m sure keeping in touch will not help either. What will we talk about? That I’m happy he met someone else?That moving on is difficult? That I’m just a miserable bitter single lady? Naaaa, let me heal in total silence please
    1. chuwechuwe
      Amen and amen. I don't understand what there is to talk about. I don't need to hate you or be dramatic. I just need you to be gone.
    2. thetoolsman Post author
      I'm not asking you to reach out to him. I'm just saying leave him there. Scroll through your TL and see him, let it register in your mind that he's gone but you're in control of your mind. You wont be forcing it to register the fact that he's gone. He'd probably reach out to you even once he notices you've left the door there but then that'd be the ultimate challenge for you. When he comes knocking, you can either peep and talk to him or open the door completely but destroying that door completely is just you denying the truth as far as Im concerned.
  8. chuwechuwe
    Although I can't say I have tried to delete photos of an ex, I understand those who do. I can honestly say exes cease to exist for me from the moment I get over them. I don't try to be friends nor do I want to. I just prefer it if they go their way and I go mine. If I happen to bump into an ex I will speak to them for a quick second and say hi and be on my way.

    As a general rule I keep my relationship and matters related thereto off social media. I will post the odd picture here and there but that's about it. Posting details about your relationship is often treated as an invitation by others to actively participate in and voice their opinions about your relationship.

    A girl I know was in a very public (in the social media sense) relationship and it was beautiful until he broke off their engagement and left her for another woman. Everyone and their dog had an opinion (some of those opinions were downright cruel) and I am sure it hurt her deeply. It is wise to learn from experience but it is wiser still to learn from the experiences of others.

    1. thetoolsman Post author
      thnaks for the example. My question to you is this? When you get married wont you put up pictures of your husband/kids on social media? If yes, do you think husbands dont hurt their wives and vice versa? Truth is, when we get overwhelmed by emotions we do all sorts of things. Posting pictures of the boo on social media is just one of those things so I dont fault the girl in question. It is however good to be discrete with these things nowadays just just because of fear of losing everything but for security etc. No one knows tomorrow, thats a fact but must you live your life in fear because of that? I say no.
      1. chuwechuwe
        when I get married, I will remain the same. I will not post effusively about my marriage or kids. Similarly, any marital issues I have will never make an appearance on social media. I am a very private person.

        My example relates to how a person was hurt but that potential pain is not my primary basis for not posting. I simply think that it is a real consideration for those who choose to indulge.

        My main basis is that relationships are private and I prefer to enjoy them as such. Above all else, I value my privacy. You will find that even in my life outside of social media, only my closest family and my closest friends have any idea what my relationship status is.

  9. Mya
    People have different coping mechanisms when shit hits the fan. Yes i'm one of those people that delete Exes that hurt me really bad. i break all forms of communication with him and it works really well for me.I don't stalk his timeline or anything. I'm actually very good at blocking people from my life,i kid you not. Call it pretense or deceit but if i can convince myself that the said person/ relationship never happened, then i'll get over him pretty fast. (LOL please don't try to understand my reasoning) When i'm sure the hurt has simmered to the barest minimum, then, we can be friends again(if he wants too). i don't think there's anything wrong with deleting pics off social media sites, maybe not immediately sha but let's face it, yall are not exactly friends anymore,so why should his/her pic still be there?
  10. tolu
    I've been here recently and getting dump over the phone can be a real pain since you can't deliver that satisfying slap. I unfollowed on twitter and deleted his numbers, it didn't make me any better cos I was still stalking his tl, so I figured instead of stalking, which is a demeaning act, I'd just go ahead and follow to get firsthand tweets :). that helped me a lot, not saying it wasn't difficult at first but as time went by, he became just another tweet. I'm glad I got rid of the numbers though else I'd have been forced to call and do something stupid. point of this is, people just getting out of a relationship for one reason or another need to do something that makes them feel like they are at least in control of themselves, if erasing everything that reminds them of this person during the healing process is what is needed, then by all means they should. doesn't mean after they are all over it and they bump into each other they won't be acknowledged. it's just means it's their own method of self-preservation. forgive my ramblings
  11. Princess Tabitha
    i don't see anything wrong in deleting an ex from social media if it won't let you move on .. Especially if you were " wickedly"' dumped for another woman. hehehe

    From my own experience,The only reason i deleted my ex off BBM was when he started putting up the cozy pictures of him and his new boo, with "love stuck smileys " Haba!! that was really insensitive? Me that was still crying and mopping about the house everyday. And there was the love of my life changing Dps of him and new chic like pata.

    It was just a month we broke up and i wasn't still over him. Matter of fact it took me a year to get over my ex…Moyaa delete e. He had the nerves to readd me again but i Sent him a text to let me be. Its been 3years now, got over him ,though single, i can now stomach his show off on FB.

    1. dee
      Now that you're over him…how does it feel when he's posting pictures of his new boo?
      I for one, find it amusing whenever I check my news feed. .. he must have thought am still single. hence the need to show off the ugly girl with bad dentition, I just want to buy braces and send to her anonymously. . … and yes. my new bobo is a massive upgrade, if he ever meet him; he'll die of jealousy. .hehehe…
  12. dee
    Why bother? no need keeping them around. Especially when you think they were the best thing that happened to you, just cut them off and move on. 4 years later we can meet each other randomly and exchange pins. . see, I've learnt my lessons. …, now my ex's Could be on my bbm or instagram and i won't feel the need to rub my new relationship in their faces. .It's hard considering that am in a better place and they all seem to be dating uglier humans…lol. I'm
  13. Marilyn
    I’m still friends( a little bit above civil) with all my exes mostly because i haven’t had one of those soul wrenching breakups. Plus I’m really just silly. Don’t know how someone that knows me wouldn’t want to remain cool with me. I’ve never been one to be public about affairs/ r-ships so…i haven’t had cause to go on mass deletion of pics and such. I remember telling a recent ex when he’d put up pics of us on bbm and the likes that i did not send him message. Whether he was trying to convince himself about the r/ship, i would never know. Couple of days after the breakup, saw a link to a pic he posted on IG through twitter. Mistakenly clicked on the twitter profile, no longer following me. Scrolled through IG….zzzzzzz. Gone were all my pics and those with him too. I laughed cause i thought it was sooooo mature. Its not like i wanted them to remain there or something, i didint even know what i wanted to be honest. Smh. I hadn’t expected it cos i felt that was the most mature r/ship i had had so it hadn’t even crossed my mind to check if he’d deleted me anywhere. He later said it was just initial breakup gragra but, o gbasa kwa m? (Does it concern me?) Nope. If you like, delete me. I will be there stalking. Best believe i know (not neccessarily following) IG handles of even my crushes from pri. School. Except you become uninteresting before i unfollow. Its not holding on to grief or something lame like that. For me, its entertainment.
    1. Marilyn
      Someone once told me maybe I’m able to get over people easily because the “love” was never there but i think they’re wrong. Its not machoness its just…”We’ve broken up. I can either sit around and be miserable all day/week/month/year/century/millenium -__- long or i can just accept it must have probably taught me some lesson I’m too lazy to think of right now and move on” 🙂
  14. Corcor
    The only reason anyone would cut off all ties with their excited is simply because they want to move on, at least that is my reason.

    I cut off all ties with my ex because he was being mostly a douchebag after our breakup and openly flirting with a girl we had issues over while we were in a relationship.

    Am I sorry or so I regret it? No.

    If that makes me look childish, shrug.

  15. ijebuPrincess
    This is exactly why I don't have the lover on any of the social media platforms (except facebook but that doesn't count anymore). He is not even the social media person so if he has accounts its always dormant. He is not even on my bbm that's how serious it is. My rationale is, if you want to say something to me CALL. He shares the same view so I don't have a problem there.

    That being said, I agree every relationship teaches us a lesson, but that doesn't mean i have to remain friends with that person on all social platforms just to learn the lesson. I will never forget no matter where i choose to delete him from, so the lessons will definitely still be learnt. That being said deleting gives some form of satisfaction or closure i suppose.

  16. Olammide
    People deal with breakups in different ways. If a breakup is really killing you it is easy to advice the person to cut off all communication because guys always find a way to take the piss if you don't.

    If i dont want to see him on my TL again cos everytime i see a tweet it sends me a message then i will unfollow him.

    I will use one of my exes as am example he is probably the first guy I wiped out of my life easily because of how bad He hurt me. Social media (twitter n all) was like our cool hangout spot always mentioning eachother so i just cudnt continue like it was nothing unfollowed him, he deleted me from bbm, I removed him as a friend on Facebook very easy. All this was a proof we dnt want to stay in contact with eachother again.

    My exes before him and even after him we are still cool. Talk when we can but before him I did not believe in those cutting off communication with an ex but It is really depends on how you feel.

    A public relationship only fuels up with social media which I am not a big fan off

  17. Theo
    This only reminds us not to put up our whole life stories on social media. if you hadn't put up 1m pics of him would there be 1m pics to delete.? hello no! there is always that one relationship that you could have sworn that was "confirm" only for it to be the most ridiculous break up ever.. onl for you to check and see that out of the 200 pics you have on instagram… 150 are of him!! we can like to keep our private matters private and avoid embarassments or akward situations.*hiss*
  18. Ijeoma
    I delete. I delete. I delete. End of story. How can anyone be so strong is beyond me. Maybe it's the Libra in me but l am definitely not trying to look at all the "cute" pictures or eventually wedding pictures. My dear, you are strong but not me. Mba nu! No way, no how. It is very very unhealthy for me. Call it emotional immaturity, call it whatever but I love in whole and not in halves. How others keep their ex close in social media is beyond me.

  19. KAD
    Keeping d exes close is nt d prob,cos I'm ok with that.Buh if u start bn a bore or overly clingy,I'd block u like I'd do any1 else,mayb not social media deleting buh d call will just not b picked and any sort of msging would be" read onLy"#[email protected]
  20. Chisom.
    I’m just here learning…. My ex broke up with me via WhatsApp the week my dad passed [2 years ago] with no remorse but she’s really a sweet girl. Didn’t feel shii cos there a more important issue at hand. 2 months later her mum passed she over needed my company and shii. This didn’t make me want to delete anything or block her out of my head. We’re very good friends now.
  21. DannyK
    Now, let me comment.

    After my own break up, I cut him off TOTALLY!. Cutting him off was even painful. I mean the reason for the breakup was no fault of ours. A decision had to be made.

    What did I do whilst he was cut off? I healed. I stopped being angry. I stopped blaming myself. I stopped trying to ask why. I stopped trying to know 'but how come'.

    Yes, I would stalk his facebook and whatnot…but I had to go through the search engine to do that. He wasn't in my face.

    I did not put myself in a situation where I would logon to facebook happy, only to be slapped by a picture of his….on my TL. Nah!!!!! Jesus died on the cross for a good reason. Please!

    Anyways. Bottom line…My ex is now my friend…so it's not like I am against being friends with them…I just think you need to heal and part of healing is getting rid of the things that remind you of the past (i.e pictures and bla bla).

    Time heals the wound of the heart. You COMMON sense is its assistant.

    I hope with these few points of mine, I have been able to convince you and not confuse you that healing starts when you take action.

    😀

  22. king push
    and hey is it just me or the guys are really sitting this one out??? Ya'all are forming hardcore now shey……Later you'll go and be listening to drake and rolling up riffa.
  23. Tori
    I do not believe in staying "friends" with an ex. We did not date to be just "friends". I like clean breaks, and that involves no contact after the break up, and erasing the ex from social media too. Even if the ex tries to be friends, I am not up for it. I just find it annoying cos it will be a constant reminder of some mistakes I made. But I don't feel any regrets, experience made me who I am.
  24. Tori
    Not even just ex boyfriends. When I stop being friends with someone, and the person wants to be friends again, it is not easy for me. I guess this is why I give a lot of chances before cutting the person off. Cos once I made that break, I like it clean, and final. I can be civil though, just not overly friendly.
  25. licia
    I dont delete, at least not immediately, esp for the break up reason. I really wldnt say iv had mch dramatic nd hurting breakups tho.
    I currently have a number of exes on my bbm who like to put up pics of their current babe or wife, and i dont feel its a calculated attempt to spite me, honestly it never bothers me.
    I think i kinda move on really easily and forget what the rship was like. So less mushiness on my part.
  26. maye
    Hmmmm I was friends with my ex up until he passed on and honestly I think that was 1 of the best decisions I made…. of course initially we cut communications for about 6 months but when we met "again" it was a really close friendship….. when I got a new boyfriend he didn't understand how I could be friends with my ex….. We broke up and it's about 3 months now and for 1 month now we haven't spoken to each other and yes I blocked him on whatsapp deleted from bbm unfollowed on twitter and Instagram but that was basically cause he was being a douche bag…
  27. BlackPearl
    I delete and block and put on limited access so I don't see all your updates and things. It is not because I hate or anything. Different people have different healing process. Beneath all the gra gra, I have a soft heart and little self control when it comes to being mad at someone so I will be the person that tries to initiate conversation. So, to avoid that, I limit my exposure to you. Once I have healed, trust that I will be the one to add you back on everything. We will be good and we'll become friends again… like i said, soft heart. Just give me the time i need to deal.

    Now off to check out what the ex has been up to
    I should also mention that I am uber private so most people on my social media did not know that I was dating the person anyway so the elimination won't be clear to anyone except myself and the other person.

  28. Fola
    I don't bliv in cutting pple off after a breakup.. my last bf deleted me off his bbm, blocked me on whatsapp, blocked on twitter, blocked my phone numbers and I was just staring like -____- cos I bliv if u truly loved some1, then some way some how, u wud still want dem in ur life even if u r just cool cos u never know what could be or mayb I haven't been as hurt as some folks… just maybe
  29. Meh
    Hmm, y'all still haven't mentioned one small issue . Sometimes it is the abuse of social media that can lead to a break up. My ex is an ethical hacker and somehow was tracking me on Facebook, Twitter, what sap , vibes, name it. He was overly possessive and made it clear even when he knew I was a private person that he was following my movements. Granted it was a long distance thing. When the proverbial hit the fan the first thing I did was remove him from all spheres of access. I just didn't need to be watched. I never cheated on him but was accused of it constantly. The only people on my Facebook are people I am invested in. I barely tweet, and Instagram is for my hobbies…. Not to show off my love life.
  30. rozyerose
    Cutting off an ex is the best thing cause sometime last year an ex broke up with me on bbm and deleted me ASAP later he was begging I add him back of which I didn't. This guy is always saying I remain skinny cos he like skinny girls. After the breakup I saw him on watsapp with some girl 10times fatter than I was so I deleted his numbers ASAP from all my phones. I believe he does stalks me on Facebook. And another ex who I did cut off respect me. I feel cutting an ex off is pretty good cos they tend to come back because of your silence.
  31. chiamaka
    So i deleted my ex from my BBM cos if i saw one more pic of his new chick i'd have broken my phone.

    Sue me!

    Grrrrrr……….

    BTW, i have a boyfriend whom i love. WTF do i get pissed over the pictures?

  32. esther
    U hmmm. ..We all have different notions and gravity to cope with any breakup. It’s so hurting and painful. Most especially if you love that person but d person undermined, mocked and humiliated n lies to u. I just can’t cope but to break all communications with him. It’s uncalled for.

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