The Naked Convos

Poll: What Would You Do If You Walked In On Your Wife Pleasing Herself?

Hey heyyy. Thank God it’s Friday. Last week we asked the ladies: Will you take a cheating pass from your husband? 60% said NO! We also asked them:Can you give your husband a cheating pass in the name of spicing up your marriage? 52% chose: The only spice anyone needs in this life is inside an Indomie pack. And when we asked the guys: Will you take a cheating pass from your wife? 50% said: There are other creative ways to announce your desire to leave Earth. When we asked the guys: Can you give your wife a cheating pass in the name of spicing up your marriage? 52% chose the option: The only spice anyone needs in this life is inside an Indomie pack. So basically, no one is giving anyone a cheating pass. The End.

Today, I’ll be taking a step back and allowing the lovely TemiNiran do her thing.


Hey guys! Your residential pervert here!

So I came across this Battabox video a couple of months ago, and while I laughed at how ridiculous some of the responses were, it reminded me of my own brief experience with the subject matter. View HERE

I was having a conversation with a particular young, educated Nigerian man and happened to mention to him that I was watching a video about vibrators, and the importance of self-pleasure for women. He responded to me by saying that if he were my man, I would never have reason to please myself. I then told him that I didn’t understand why there even had to be a choice between the two; why I couldn’t receive pleasure from my “man”, while also learning to please myself.

I realized after a little back-and-forth that for him, the use of a vibrator meant that there was something he wasn’t doing right. It in essence meant that he and said vibrator would be fierce competitors, working towards a united goal of pleasuring a very lucky (or unlucky, depending on his stroke game) woman. It was then that I decided to throw the question out.

In my opinion, pleasure is pleasure, and communication is key. If the scenario in the video below (my man walking in on me using a vibrator) occurred, unless we were already having issues relating to sex in the relationship, I wouldn’t expect that he would be offended. I also would hope that he would see vibrators not as competition, but as an instrument that can further enhance pleasure. I do however understand that not everyone is the same. So guys, how would you feel about your woman using a vibrator? If you object, why?

[polldaddy poll=9260943]

[polldaddy poll=9260950]

Temi Niran is a content developer, food lover, and Television Connoisseur. She also just stole this description from her Twitter bio. When she isn't reading articles/novels, she's on her social Blog.

  • 11
    Errrr, nothing i guess, because I would have bought her one or two before we get married.
    January 8, 2016
  • What’s there to be offended by?

    She’s pleasuring herself, you walk in, if you feel like it, you take the vibrator and do an even better an even better job with it.

    Or if you’re feeling voyeurish, you sit back and enjoy the sights.

    I can’t fathom how a man should be angry or something else because you walked in on your woman pleasuring herself.

    January 8, 2016
  • Hmmm.. interesting one. I can’t even process it. I’ll just leave it at that.

    It’s New Year Repost Day 8 where I repost 10 of the most popular posts of 2015.

    January 8, 2016
    • No na, tell us more.. Why can’t you process it?
      January 8, 2016
  • Bem Bem
    Ahh! Very dicy situation here.. well bursting into hysterical tears definitely not going to be my reaction, buh I’ll really Be surprised and a bit gutted especially if it never ever came up in our conversations, ultimately dialogue is key, I’d want my wife to to happy all day err day!!!! Happy New year Tnc FAM!!!
    January 8, 2016
  • King Push
    I won’t vote because I expected the male section to have a “join her” option.
    That said, watching that video actually made me feel bad for Nigerian women or should I say African women as a whole. African men are selfish and let ego get in the way of things that should be fun to explore together with your wife/gf.
    Iono call me weird but if I walk into my wife playing with a vib, I’d more turned on than mad. Yes we would have a conversation about it….but not until after we both cum.
    January 8, 2016
    • Kels
      Kai! You just spoke my mind. I was scrolling down to ask why the “join her” option wasn’t included, then i saw this.
      I fail to understand how any guy would walk in and get angry at that sight. I can’t
      January 8, 2016
    • After I stopped laughing, I honestly felt the same way about the video. It’s like a general consensus amongst Nigerian women (or women in general) that their pleasure doesn’t matter. I also wonder how many of those men pleasure themselves in the absence of their wives
      January 8, 2016
    • Cavey
      Join her first, dialogue later.
      January 11, 2016
  • Larz
    If your husband walks in on you pleasuring yourself and is surprised. You have a bigger problem that self pleasure or vibrator. It means through out your dating and marrying, you guys havent communicated enuf about your sexual needs and wants. It means you have spent a greater part of your relationship pretending or he has been oblivious. Once you master the art of pretending on one thing, it becomes easier to be deceptive going forward.

    I hate our society for putting women in a situation where they have to pretend to be one extreme or another less sexual good girl (in conservative environement) or overly sexual bad girl (in hip hop, twerk crowd). For each couple, we shud be able to come as we are and have frank discussion on our sexual needs and desire and be honest with each other on whether or not we are able to partner with the other without passing judgement. I recently red on BN about a pegging couple, whilst that is not my cup of tea, I would like to speak to my lover abiut it and we can come to agreement on how to proceed and even if there is no middle ground (i.e. He cant give it up and i cant deliver), we shud be able to part way with respect for each other and not leave them feeling like they will never divulge this to the next person they meet.

    The last person thay should be surprised about your sexual preferences should be your spouse. Unfortunately, that is not the case in most scenarios.

    January 8, 2016
  • Blaqlotus
    The “Blame the devil” option though.. Lmao. I’ve found out that men want their GFs to have vibrators and be freakish in bed, But when they get married, they expect her to be holier than thou.
    January 8, 2016
  • Blaqlotus
    Okay, i just watched the video. Your wife using a vibrator doesn’t necessarily mean you’re not satisfying her in bed (i’m sure most of them aren’t), No be food wey person dey belleful na, when you belleful sef, food dey digest and you want to eat more. I see nothing wrong in owning a vibrator, although i’m not one for inserting anything foreign inside me.
    January 8, 2016
  • Five Loaves
    Haha, the Dr. Azolibe option got me. But its true tho. If i were to be a man, i will be quite sad, but it should also be an opportunity to ask what the problem is.
    January 8, 2016
    • But why do you assume there is a problem?
      January 8, 2016
  • Kiki
    Well…i’d be surprised for sure. Cos for me i’m so open to new suggestions when with my boo. Though i & boo haven’t done it we talk constantly about what we want when its time & its crazy & i love it that way. Personally if i walk in & see him with that….my first reaction…What are u doing…lol. Then so many thoughts, like wasn’t i good But really though its not bad but i wouldn’t wish for it to happen, i don’t want him getting addicted to it. We’ll definitely dialogue & that vibrator has got to go like asap
    January 8, 2016
    • Miz
      If you and boo haven’t done it yet and you walk in on him using a vibrator….well….you may have to ask a whole other set of questions!
      January 8, 2016
      • kiki
        Well…yes we haven’t done it! But we’ve done other stuff..that we both enjoy *wink* but yes, I get what u mean, asking a while lot of questions would definitely suffice. But I’m sure he wouldn’t do me. He stayed without it for 2years & we’ve agreed to do it after our engagement which is soon..(I have 8 crazy styles in mind…Heheehee)
        January 11, 2016
  • Deee
    Father Lord, provide a man…
    January 8, 2016
  • GB
    I’ll only feel betrayed if I’m in the same house and she didn’t call me to watch. Angry, ke? Feel inadequate, ke? Let the vibe-ing roll!

    When she’s done, there’ll be an encore, if you get my drift. 😉

    January 8, 2016
  • Badt Guy GB… I sight U
    January 8, 2016
  • Why wasn’t there a ‘join the party’ option for guys?
    in that situation, my reaction will depend on how busy I am at that point as well as my state of mind.

    Scenario 1: I have nothing else to do and I am in a good mood, I pull off my clothes wave them in the air and jump in the party (a don curr if it’s alone time she wants)

    2. I have nothing else to do but I don’t feel like getting my groove on, I sit down, lean back and watch
    3. I have something to do or I am in a black mood, please carry on, do not stop on my account.

    In no scenario does the question ‘am I satisfying her?’ come in and no scenario is a surprise (except she was supposed to be somewhere else) because communication game 100%

    January 9, 2016
  • DRaX
    The Dr. Azolibe option though ..???…
    January 9, 2016
  • ibiela
    Vibrator na man wey person go dey vex for? When did masturbation become a crime?
    January 9, 2016
  • Omotawler
    Having watched that video, why do men think there has to be a problem for their wives using vibrators? Using a vibrator doesn’t necessarily mean she isn’t getting satisfied by the man. If i was a man and walked in on my wife using a vibrator, I’d watch her do her thing and afterwards an encore follows as GB said..
    January 9, 2016
  • Funk
    Lool. First off that video is hilarious. It’s incredible how little we understand about sexuality. Me sef dey learn everyday.
    Ladies, if you don’t expect us to be mad or question ourselves if we learn you have a vibrator, don’t be mad or feel inadequate either if you catch us wanking to porn. How’s that? Same thing tbh.
    A POV I subscribe to is this: Sex, ideally, is about giving; you’re concerned about your partner’s pleasure. When a lady’s using a vibrator or a guy’s jerking off, it’s not an indictment of their partner; not always anyway. It’s mostly just about having alone time. This time where they’re concentrating on their own pleasure and no one else’s. So chill. If you feel your partner’s not doing enough sexually you should talk to them about it though. Communicate. Teach.
    January 9, 2016
  • Aisha
    Biko where did they find Mr. Potent guy?
    January 9, 2016
  • Things are fast changing, and sexual adventure seems on the high in these parts. Some sort of sexual revolution is leaving more and more folks open (especially ladies). For me not to be surprised seeing wifey with a vibrator, we must have had a discussion or discussions about it prior to that moment when I walk in on her. It’s no different from communicating with your partner that you masturbate (Interestingly many folks will hardly declare that one).

    We should have discussed its appropriateness in line with our sexual values as a couple. If we have agreed that it is not appropriate , I’d be surprised, and feel betrayed. On the other hand, if we had agreed to extremely open sexuality with no boundaries, then why should I be surprised.

    January 11, 2016
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