Find A Foreign Husband!

Opinion

I was going through my TNC dashboard one early morning when I saw one of those banner ads at the top of the screen. It read ‘Find a foreign husband’. L’aaaro kutu kutu!  It’s not the first time I’ve seen a banner ad claiming to foster relationships, or talking about a dating site on this…

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I was going through my TNC dashboard one early morning when I saw one of those banner ads at the top of the screen. It read ‘Find a foreign husband’. L’aaaro kutu kutu!  It’s not the first time I’ve seen a banner ad claiming to foster relationships, or talking about a dating site on this our TNC. I saw one about an Arabian dating site at some point with an ‘Arabian’ girl’s picture – abi our men want to move to Saudi ni? Please o, they are barely enough for us, so they should stay home abeg.

But why are they here, these ‘relationship’ sites? And why do they show up on my page? Are they trying to send me a message? Or is it someone else they are trying to talk to? I know that in marketing, before you choose to advertise on any platform, you’ve got to be sure that your target audience is on or will go to that platform. And for you to accept any advertising on your platform, at least beyond the money, you would to a large extent know whether or not it’s an ad that will do well, and you might even go the extra mile and choose not to accept anything that doesn’t fit with your brand or your values.

So, someone must think we (TNC community) are plenty single and that we are plenty lonely too, especially the women, as I am yet to see a ‘find a wife’ ad, unless that only shows on males’ pages. And we contributors don’t help either, because we talk too much about love in this place. Reminds me of Funmi O’s article about writer contributions where she was asking us to talk about something besides love. Well, Oops! Sorry Funmi. Here’s yet another article about love/relationships/man and woman tins. I couldn’t help it.

Whenever these ads come up, I find myself “unlooking”. Cos I don’t want to see it. It’s almost like someone took my mother’s voice and put it in the computer, so she can be reminding me that I’m not married, and that I haven’t brought a man home. Hmm, thou shalt not oppress the poor o. Or those that do not have (I’m sure that is said somewhere in the Bible, even if not in those exact words); because no condition is permanent. We ‘Have nots’ shall become ‘Haves’ one day. Hopefully, it won’t be by looting the present ‘Haves’ of their possessions.

Anyway, back to the matter. So the banner says ‘find a foreign husband’ and I’m wondering, are there no more husbands in Nigeria? Have they finished? Or is it a case of Nigerian men refusing to enrol for these ‘husband development’ programmes? Abi won ti yari pata pata? (Please a nice Yoruba person should translate). They don’t want to marry again? Or are the foreign men looking for Nigerian girls? Maybe their own girls have refused to marry them? Or Nigerian girls now want to be international wives? I won’t be surprised especially with this forex crunch. It would be great to ‘earn’ forex. Marrying a foreign man is just as good a job as any, but even better if you’re collecting your housekeeping allowance in dollars.

Now, beyond seeing these ads, I wonder if these advertisers get the ‘bang for their buck’. Do people click on these things? Research suggests that people click on one out of every 2000 facebook ads seen. And I read somewhere that you’re more likely to survive a plane crash than click on a banner ad (kinda sounds like me, I would never click a banner ad). If that’s the case, then why do these guys keep trying? For the tiny percentage that click?

If they (the few clickers) do, what’s it like? Do they get results? Are there any ‘success stories’? Please if you have clicked, use anonymous name if you must, but tell us what the experience was like. Is it about love or just finding a husband/girlfriend/partner? Are there horror stories? Stalker stories? Disaster date stories? I’m really curious about how they work (so much for ‘unlooking’ at the ad in the first place).

I know one (or two) oversabi person(s) will probably say in the comment box “MissO, why don’t you click to find out for yourself?” You know yourself. Please, I don’t want to see you here, you hear me? *pulling my right ear* I’ve already helped you write your comment, so no need.

I want to hear from those that have clicked. Why did you click? Did it work? Would you click again? (that’s assuming the first (few) clicks worked or didn’t work). And from those that have considered clicking. What stopped you, or why haven’t you? And from people like me who will never click. Why won’t you click? What are you (we) so afraid of? Me, I’m afraid of malware. Yes, that’s my story, and I’m sticking to it (I won’t mention the unhealthy and debilitating fear of looking desperate, going online shopping for husband/boyfriend).

Go ahead and say something. You know you want to…

Responses

  1. Andronicus
    The one that amuses me is when I’m online in Nigeria and I see dating site ads saying,
    ‘Yemisi is just 5km away from your location’ or
    ‘Nwanneka would like to know you better’
    and the pictures on these Ads are White Girls!
  2. soplain
    MissO I am just like you ….I won’t click o….the ones dat I can see physically how many have I finish with not to talk about d ones i crush on in TNC …ads ke ..wen wat I am looking for in sokoto is in my Sokoto ..
  3. Bambistic
    Hilarious! When all the naija boiz wan marry abroad gehls, why dem no go advertize foreign bobos? Seriously though, I think part of the intention of the ads is not just to get you to click the banner. Even if you don’t click the banner, they still got your attention and the product name is most likely resting in your subconcious. While I too do not click I have googled products or brands based on an ad I saw or remember seeing. Either way dem go catch consumers jare.

    Posted from TNC Mobile

  4. Toni
    If you shop online, you may have a story or two of how what you saw online was as different from what was delivered to you as Forex rate of today is different from just 10 months ago. And the difference is usually dissappointing. Before I’ll click 26 year old Natasha and it’s 54 year old Nana that is calling me instead.
    1. MissO Post author
      But 54 yr old Nana might just be a good match 😉
      You are so right though about the difference between advertised and actual. Me, I just believe that some evil people just use those platforms to prey on vulnerable and unsuspecting others.
  5. Joko
    must sha find trouble 😂😂😂

    I won’t click as well. Lailai. First – because of malware (autocorrect kept changing this to ‘male are’. Mtshewww!)

    Second – just like Soplain said…plenty physical people to engage. Why would I think of the virtual ones?! Naa…

  6. Dami
    Oh my! This is hilarious. I was about to ask that question though. Bit like @morris said, they might end up referring you to sites like Eskimo and you’re there like “but I didn’t click on an Eskimo link”

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