DISCLAIMER: I didn’t write this post because I’m going through a breakup of any sort.
Break ups are hard and leave people emotionally paralyzed but they are only part of the experiences we humans must go through. It hurts at first and a grieving period is allowed for a while – sad music, tubs of ice cream and booze and what not – but at some point it, the wallowing has to stop.
Hi, my name is S and I have had my fair share of unfortunate break-ups, whether it was an actual relationship or a situationship, cutting people you once cared about out of your life is not an easy thing to do. The worst break up I ever had was in 2013, I was distraught beyond human comprehension, my goodness. I wasn’t sleeping, I drowned myself in alcohol, I was cussing more than ever before, I picked up smoking, it was horrible and the worst part is I couldn’t cry.
Let me tell you something, don’t ever let anyone tell you to stop crying, or that you have cried about something too long. F*ck that! If crying helps, please cry. Personally I’m not completely over something until I cry about it. I wanted to cry so badly but the bloody tears wouldn’t just fall… He was such a great lover, such a great great lover and I couldn’t come to terms with the fact that things had ended so abruptly. It was a mess and there was nothing I could do to fix it except fly to the other side of the world… but that didn’t happen.
Eventually one day at work like 7 months after, I finally had the nervous breakdown I deserved and I cried and cried and cried and cried until I was completely dehydrated and asked the office manager to let me go home. He believed someone in my family had passed on and without hesitation gave me two days off, hugging me and saying “sorry for your loss S”. It was indeed a loss. I still miss him from time to time, but not in that ‘I can’t breathe’ way anymore, I’m over it now. That’s the thing about mourning, when you’re done, you’ve gotta pick yourself up and let that next hottie find you or vice versa.
So how can you get over this sad time of your life? That’s why I’m here today. Let’s see:
Cry: CRY CRY CRY CRY! Don’t even come at me with that crying will not change anything. Crying helps release suppressed emotions. Cry it out. Don’t let anyone dictate to you how you choose to grieve.
Alcohol: If you are one of those “I don’t drink types” you’re going to need to jump on board, and fast! Pick which one works for you, wine has the least alcohol content for starters but if you’re looking to be completely f*cked up, there’s tequila! Alcohol helps you deal with life, simple.
Avoid your ex like a plague: After a break up, change your routine, don’t go to places where you know your ex will most likely be. Not seeing your ex is part of the detoxification process. It will be difficult, definitely, but it’s necessary so that old feelings don’t start creeping up. If you can move to another country please do that.
Get them off your social media: Facebook, Skype, BBM, Twitter, Instagram,Whatsapp, SnapChat, iMessage, delete them all. Keeping them active on your social media usually leads to stalking them. This only drags you back, making you wish you were still with them. It’s unhealthy; no need to keep tabs on them. They are not your business anymore.
Change your lingerie closet! : For ladies, all that sexy lingerie you had when you and the former lover were together… You’ve got to let it all go. Toss all the La Senza, Agent Provocateur, La Perla, Victoria’s Secret in a bin, pour some vodka on them, then light a match while you dance around the burning pile sipping some hard liquor, preferably scotch while chanting something from Rihanna’s new album, preferably ‘WOO’.
F*ck it out: It’s imperative to do this. Let someone in to let someone out (all pun intended). This isn’t really the time to go on a fast; you need to find an ‘avenue’ by which your sexual desires are met. Notice I didn’t say find a new lover, your heart needs to recover from the emotional trauma but your lady and man bits don’t need to. You need to f*ck your ex out of your system!
Life is too short to dwell on a break up; there is a whole world out there. What coping mechanisms have you guys employed while trying to get over a break up?
Image Credit: Tumblr, The Gloss, Twitter, Instagram, E! Online