There’s something about a man on one knee, ring in hand, and a woman in shock, beaming with smiles, blushing from the surprise of being proposed to that intrigues people. Perhaps because it is a defining moment in a person’s life, and because people love happy endings, everyone expects the girl to say yes (even though that may not end happily).
Marriage can be a wonderful thing and I get that on the journey people love to make beautiful memories, hence, ceremonies, and people love to keep and share these memories, hence the pictures and social media posts.
This, however, sometimes seems like an act to me. What would you call it when a couple that is not in a good place in their relationship posts pictures and doting messages on social media? I know a couple who were already planning their wedding before the guy did the proposal [ceremony], and I wondered, “What is the point? Shebi they’ve already agreed to get married.” But I’ve been told I’m not romantic.
I came across a proposal video on the internet where, to me, the girl seemed displeased. It looked like she was pressured into saying yes by the people shouting “say yes, say yes”, as if it was their yes to say. Maybe the guy just wanted to do something sweet and romantic. Maybe he wanted to trap her into saying yes. Maybe the girl wasn’t ready for marriage. Maybe the girl doesn’t love him—enough. A lot of thoughts crossed my mind while watching the video; it was kind of sad to watch.
Before a marriage proposal takes place, conversations must have been had, and both parties must know if they are ready to get married and what the partner would be comfortable with in terms of a proposal. This doesn’t have to take away the element of surprise. You should know the kind of space/place your partner is comfortable in. You should know what your partner’s life plan is: Do they want to get a job or finish a degree before getting married? Proposals don’t have to be public to be beautiful and if someone says no to a marriage proposal, it may not mean they do not love you.
I love beautiful sentences, perhaps this why I have always had a crush on writers. I have always imagined that if I was ever going to get proposed to, it would be a conversation and involve being told some really beautiful lines. There would be just two people present at this proposal ceremony: me and prospective husband. So, I’m putting this out there, lest someone triy to surprise me in a public space with family and friends encouraging me to say yes when all I really want to say is: “shut the fuck up and get out of my way!”
What’s your dream proposal like? How would you like to propose or be proposed to? Express you!
Photo Credit: PULSENG