My Prince Is Just NOT Coming…

Opinion

So, No! My prince is not coming on a white horse, he is not riding a turtle and he is definitely not walking. My prince is just NOT coming…

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You know how the world is becoming a global village and social media is no longer a strange place to meet people. There all these trends of how people meet on social media, get married and live happily ever after.

Well…. What nobody tells you is that social media is also a good place to meet someone and have your heart broken into a million different  tiny pieces. Yes. These are the stories that never make front page twitter.

We met on social media… Everyone’s always saying I need to get out of my comfort zone. It’s hard to meet guys the old-fashioned way. So, I did what? I replied that DM. For the most part, he was a perfect gentleman. We saw a movie together for our first date and the banter afterwards was legendary. He was the quiet type but we got pretty comfortable talking to each other about literally everything. We fast became good friends and he was the first person I wanted to tell about anything in my life that was remotely important. Without even realizing it, the balance of our friendship had tilted ever so slightly beyond the friendzone.

Then we kissed… Something happened that day. It wasn’t like the earth stopped moving and it was just the two of us. No, nothing that dramatic. But in that moment, I wanted more. I literally fled from his house that evening because I did not want to come to terms with my reality. What if he was ok with us just being friends and me I was there catching feelings?

We didn’t speak throughout the next day and I thought oh gawd, this is the part where it gets awkward, we become weird and just stop talking to each other… But he called in the evening. He had a really busy day at work but he couldn’t stop thinking about us all day… and how we should have a repeat of yesterday because it was perfect.

He had to travel for a while so we didn’t have the space to explore our new-found intimacy but we grew closer. We were chatting late into the night then he got tired and said he was going to bed. I still had at least an hour of work to do so he let me have my space. An odd twenty minutes after he said he was going to bed, he sends me another message.

“I have a confession to make”.

I slowly close my laptop because with all the alarm bells that immediately started ringing in my head, I needed to be alert for this.

“The truth is the more I get to know you the better I like you. You are simply put quite amazing.”

OK, he is just being cute. Everything is fine… Then he pulled the rug…

“The truth is I have been in a relationship with someone before we met.”

“I’m not sure for some reason I didn’t want to tell you which is unlike me”

“I kind of wanted to see where things led with you… still do, but feel you deserve to know”

“I didn’t want to choose”

The end… At least for me. I decided to help him make that choice .So I told him to focus on his relationship because having me in the picture would not be healthy for him or for me.

So, no…This 13th time is not the charm… Yes, I keep track…you can read about my 12 previous adventures here and this pond is only filled with frogs.

I’ve been thinking about it. What kind of person must I actually be to attract only the type of men who are able to continue this cycle of pain and hurt. Maybe I’m really a terrible person and the universe is using all these experiences to show me that I really ain’t s**t.

Ok universe. I get it. I’m not the worst person in the world but  I’ve heard you and I give up. I’m no longer trying.

I know that true love exists. I’m a product of that love. I have grown up knowing what it feels like and I have thankfully been surrounded by it. But I give up on finding that love. I give up on hurting myself… over and over again.

So, No! My prince is not coming on a white horse, he is not riding a turtle and he is definitely not walking. My prince is just NOT coming…

Responses

  1. CeeCee
    Okay so I believe this word love is really big and unexpected. We go on in life loving as many times as we allow ourselves.

    Giving up on that relationship doesn’t always mean you are weak; it means that you are strong enough to let go, but do not give up totally on love and do not force it either. Your prince will come, it might not be when you want him to, but he definitely will. Keep kissing the frogs girl!

    Now if he doesn’t come, we cannot come and kill ourselves, we shall go on living and hoping and trying our best to be happy.

  2. vanilla
    Oh, your prince is definitely coming!

    But i will say, ask the very obvious questions from the onset as that helps you eliminate the many frogs along the way that may put you in the last situation u found yourself in. Never assume he is single.
    Lets say you ask the right questions, give it your all, love with abandon but the the relationship still fails. Well, like CeeCee said…’we cannot come and go and kill ourselves”. So, dust him off and go…’NEXT!!!’, then give it your best all over again.

    1. Iluna Post author
      You’re right… But you know what they say about not helping who you fall in love with… I was happy being just friends with him… At least I thought I was… Thank you Vanilla!❤
  3. 100% Pogonophile
    Sometimes you just miss that companionship no friend or friends with benefit can give you. I feel you. I’m also in the same boat. Losing hope doesn’t cut it but surely things will turn out for the better. Just hang in there and have fun meeting them, don’t have expectations when you meet and hang out as these can send your heart racing over time only to be shattered. Read between the lines….yeah the unspoken words and gestures, trust your guts and stop counting. What are the numbers for anyway??
    1. Iluna Post author
      First of I had to google to find out what Pogonophile meant! Thank you for the education! Lol the numbers are a force of habit… And can you actually meet someone and have no expectations!?
      1. 100% Pogonophile
        Yes you can. If you put your mind to it. The trick is to leave a good impression knowing you might not hear or see them again. No pain, no gain. Its hard especially if you two fit like a glove when it comes to banter, interests and etal. Unrequited love hurts but you gotta take care of your heart first. Your heart cannot go and be doing atilogwu dance at an opera. Keep it in check!
  4. V
    Hmm
    Story of lives….
    Me i can’t even afford to date at the moment,
    I don’t want to subject myself to any “leg” or subject any lady to tough shit & stories that touch, especially as i’m a romantic/adventure loving somebori, i want to eat out, swim, travel, visit art galleries,shoot some paintball etc….Butttt Entrepreneurship has humbled & disciplined me, almost every pleasure is pushed to the “delayed gratification” capsule…reminds me of something i saw – “If you are broke, you don’t have a Right to an erection” or a “passport for relationship visa”…..hahaha
    1. Iluna Post author
      Lol well on the subject of being broke and not being in a relationship, I can’t really say much. But it’s good to know there are still people out there who wait till they are ready (by their own definition) to be in a relationship. Cheers!

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