****

THE FIRST TIME WE… KISSED

First time

“Stealing With Kisses”

by @MiszJeanie

_____

I can hear my blood in my ears, or is that my heart? I’ve never seen anyone this close up before, not even myself and yet I want to be closer. So close I will be bathed in his scent, well, more like the smell of Tom-Tom, but let’s not get into that. His eyebrows are so full and that jawline bearing the beginnings of a to-be-glorious beard. I’ve never seen his eyes so close and for the first time, I can tell they’re brown, not black. Dark brown, like unwilling dark chocolate. I’m so close I can see where his lashes start and I’m right there when they begin to flutter. What is it with kissing and closing our eyes? Is it so all our other senses come alive until we’re bursting at the seams with sensations? Is it because our eyes are the least connected sense to our feelings? I’ve never been much of a rebel, so I close my eyes.

“Mhonum, look at him! How can anyone be so fine?”

Mhonum, my best friend sneers at me. “Please, I know finer boys. And this Wole one is just there, always feeling like the world is at his feet”

“But Mhonum, the world is at his feet. His family has everything and…”

“And so? We should disappear? Abeggi”

“I don’t care, he’s fine”

I want to be good at this for him, impress him, but nature can only lead me so far and so when my lips touch his, I freeze. I’m waiting for him to lead me, show me how to be good at this. And so he does. I try to taste his life through his lips. How many tears have fallen this low? How many lips have they met? How many cheeks? And did they quiver when he was afraid, unsure? And oh, how the softness of his lips belie his hard exterior. Oh what truths they tell.

“Ofei, your boyfriend is fighting again” Mhonum hisses

“Where? Where? With who?” I’m scrambling out of my seat.

“See how you’re running! Do you have a boyfriend?” Mhonum is shaking her head in that way that reminds me of my mother. With her plump hips and full chest, she almost always feels too motherly for her fifteen years.

“Does it matter? I know who you mean, so that’s all that matters. Do you wonder why he’s always fighting?”

“He’s an entitled brat, that’s why. Come to the library with me?”

Mr. Bassey is holding Wole by his belt and almost pulling him to the principal’s office.

He catches me looking at him. I want to keep staring, everyone else is anyway. But I feel caught. Invaded.

Wole is hesitant, but eventually, his tongue is in my mouth, searching, perhaps for truths of his own. I’m worried for a second that he won’t like the truths he finds. Will he taste desperation on my tongue? Will he taste my inexperience? Will he hate it? Will he taste my “practice” mirror? Will he want to kiss me again? Or will I never be able to tell if I simply dreamed this? I’m sure he can taste the questions on the tip of my tongue.

“I saw you looking at me”

“And so? Didn’t you see other people looking too? Please shift, let me pass”

“You were looking at me differently. I know what you want”

“You don’t know anything about me!”

I’m finally beginning to lose myself in his warmth. To glory in this feeling, live in this moment. I forget I’m against the wall with the weak paint. White paint that begins to chafe and fall to pieces whenever it’s touched. I’m not thinking of the huge white mark I’ll have on my uniform or how I’ll explain this to Mhonum or my mother. I’m only thinking of Wole. Of how dreams come true. Of how this moment will live in my heart forever and how I’ll replay it over and over like that “Khona” song Mhonum played for me. I never want this to end.

“I’m… I’m sorry about what I said before, in the hallway”

I look up at him. I’ve never seen Wole Oyeniran look so subdued. I keep looking because this is what I do. I burn this into my memory, by staring. I have a slideshow of memories, unlike anyone else. I don’t just live things. I memorize them. The essence of them.The sounds, the smells, the feelings, the tastes. Even before the sights.

“I forgive you. Go and sin no more”

He laughs and my heart stops. He laughed at my joke! Mhonum should hear this! I’m funny!

“So what’s with the fights? Didn’t anyone teach you about dialogue?”

Wole doesn’t say anything. Then he sighs and sits next to me.

“I don’t know. I’m just angry.”

“Why? Why are you always so angry? Your life is perfect”

“That’s the problem. No one understands the difference between appearing perfect and being perfect. They expect me to be happy and loving and I don’t know how to be either of those things. No one taught me”

I’m so unseated by this news. No one taught him? Who teaches you to love?

“What does that mean?”

“Who taught you? To be happy, to love people?”

“I don’t know, I just do”

“You’re lucky then. My mother loves Jack Daniels more than she loves anything or anyone else and my father doesn’t care. I feel like a hollow person. Like I’m a walking hole. No one likes me, I know”

This was my chance and I was going to take it.

“I like you. I can show you how to love people. It all starts with doing nice things and being thoughtful. It’s really easy”

“Then kiss me”

When we finally pull away, I’m smiling.  He takes my hand in his and says

“Thank you for showing me what love is, but, I don’t think this is the sort of love I wanted”. He winks at me and walks away leaving me clutching my heart. It’s still beating, but it’s bleeding too.

“I will not cry, I will not cry” I tell myself  a million times over. He isn’t worth my tears. But even as I say those words, the tears of shame fall shamelessly. Humiliation is so hot against my chest and I do not tell Mhonum. Even when Wole winks at me in Math class, I do not explain to her. I do not kiss Wole again until we leave school.

The last time isn’t like our first. It’s on cold asphalt as I try to resuscitate him ten years later. He never did change his bad boy ways.

****

The First Time…We special is proudly sponsored by SureGifts.com.ng

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Comments
  • Avatar
    Bukola

    🙁 this one is sad….

    February 10, 2014
    • Avatar
      thetoolsman

      <[_] your chapman..

      February 11, 2014
  • Avatar
    Bukola

    am i the furst???? yayyyy

    February 10, 2014
  • Avatar
    douye

    aww

    February 10, 2014
  • Avatar

    :'(

    February 10, 2014
  • Avatar

    bleh

    February 10, 2014
  • Avatar
    may0

    osheey! now this. is a baddest guy ever liveth.

    February 10, 2014
  • Avatar
    nijezie

    *Continues taking notes.*

    February 10, 2014
  • Avatar
    immortalteddybear

    Wow. I did not see that coming.

    February 10, 2014
    • Avatar
      grateful

      me neither. Nice one

      February 10, 2014
  • Avatar
    Tiwalade

    Love this!!!!!!!!!!

    And lol smh, wole

    February 10, 2014
  • Avatar
    Annie

    THIS was a good one! (Y)
    I thoroughly enjoyed it.

    February 10, 2014
  • Avatar
    Cassandra Ikegbune

    Aww. The last line. *sigh* you write so well afoma.

    February 10, 2014
  • Avatar

    What Cassandra said. Beautiful :’)

    February 10, 2014
  • Avatar
    miss bee

    Why am i never first? Pfft! I loved it

    February 10, 2014
  • Avatar
    tee

    Dint see the End coming. Nice.

    February 10, 2014
  • Avatar
    Diyan' Ebe

    loved it!!!

    February 10, 2014
  • Avatar

    Did not see that one coming .
    I love it.

    February 10, 2014
  • Avatar
    imperfectlyperfect92

    didn't see the end coming too,ended on a sad note, I went all 'ohhh' but, loved this.

    February 10, 2014
  • Avatar
    janusaneni

    I read this and my first thought was Awesome!
    I like way you carried the story from the beginning, the style too. Thought the sudden rejection was a bit too abrupt, but it made me laugh, so no mind.
    I like! I like lots..

    February 11, 2014
  • Avatar
    toeseen

    oh yes i did it just for you- i signed up just so i could comment..and this was yet another lovely work. keep it up dear.

    February 11, 2014
  • Avatar
    toeseen

    oh and i came back to say Wole's a jerk!

    February 11, 2014
  • Avatar
    Terdoh

    And then Wole grew up to become an Alchemist. And was an awesome writer. Like the girl whose first kiss he owns….

    February 11, 2014
    • Avatar

      Wait, what?

      February 11, 2014
    • Avatar
      @Sirkastiq

      LMAOOOOOO..

      February 11, 2014
    • Avatar
      thetoolsman

      hahahahaha.. spot on..

      February 11, 2014
    • Avatar

      Hahahahaha

      February 11, 2014
    • Avatar
      musingsofagidimallam

      BEST COMMENT!!!

      February 14, 2014
  • Avatar
    @Sirkastiq

    All you "I did not see that coming" people, Y'all trying to steal Nostradamus' shine innit?

    February 11, 2014
  • Avatar
    thetoolsman

    I really like this one.. Love love the style..

    February 11, 2014
  • Avatar

    Shiyet this was good!!…
    For some reason I find myself pissed at Mhonum,the classic nottie…always spoiling market for boys..pfft

    February 11, 2014
  • Avatar
    ViviiannnnnE

    Awww… Just beautiful! I wish I could write like this

    February 11, 2014
  • Avatar
    Tori

    I loved reading this. It kept me captivated. Very nice. I love the fact that it is not mushy. I love the twist.

    February 11, 2014
  • Avatar
    Bee

    I totally love this! That twist definitely brought out an ouch! from me. What a Wole. Lol

    February 11, 2014
  • Avatar
    edgothboy

    Oh Ma cherie, that twist at the end was divine. I really really liked the juxtaposition of dialogue and narrative. Enter for the writer and bring it home.

    February 12, 2014
    • Avatar
      heartstringsandkeynotes

      You and big grammar sha…

      February 12, 2014
  • Avatar
    feyisayofunmi

    I did not see it coming,what a twist

    February 12, 2014
  • Avatar
    ijebuPrincess

    nice piece. bit of poetry, romance, comedy, and a beautiful twist at the end. well done!
    but the Wole guy na sharp boy sha. its so funny how people use sub-stories to get away with everything. especially on all these talent hunt shows where they'll just come and say they are singing on behalf of their dead mother and everybody will rush and vote for them. KMT!

    February 13, 2014
  • Avatar
    MsBraimah

    Lol… teenage girls

    February 13, 2014
  • Avatar
    irebowale

    Love love love this. Amazing

    February 14, 2014
  • Avatar
    musingsofagidimallam

    *slow clap* Beautiful writing. I really enjoyed this. Well done

    February 14, 2014
  • Avatar

    Afoma!!!!
    *sigh*… What you do to me.
    Don’t stop writing.

    February 15, 2014
  • Avatar

    Loved this story, beautiful, sad….my favourite kind of stories

    February 15, 2014
  • Avatar

    Erm, using my exact name is a bit much of a coincidence.

    Do you actually know someone with my name?

    October 23, 2015
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