Humming ‘You’re just too good to be true, can’t take my eyes off you, you’d be like heaven to touch, I wanna hold you so much’ That’s what you do to me. I’m by myself singing and dancing to no music but just the thought that you want me and all you left to be with me, has made me a fool for you. You make me sing, you make me brave, my heart does that flip flop thing when you and I are together. Sometimes I just want to forget the world exists and do life with you because anytime I set my eyes on you, I know my soul has found its resting place. In Jerry Maguire, Tom cruise tells Renee that she completes him but I would disagree to that. You are what completion is about. You complete me.
I know you chased me for years, watching me each and every day when I ignored you or didn’t even realize you were there and wanted me this much. All my life, I have never known love this way. And then, you came as a whisper, you kept pulling the strings of my heart till I turned and saw you. Even when I did, I still could not recognize you. I chased after other lovers and other things that I felt could satisfy me because I felt you didn’t have what I wanted. I felt you were just there doing your thing and I could do what I had the capability to do. I didn’t understand what it meant to be faithful but I tried. Times when my heart went after another were the times I hadn’t experienced real love.
Do you remember that poem I wrote for you years ago? I remember being alone with you. I think you were beginning to pull my strings then because I look at that poem today and I wonder what part of me was so open and vulnerable to you. I’ve come to realize that it’s what you want. I can’t even form for you. Those days when I tried to hold on to my heart and you with your never ending love reached out and told me it was okay to become an open book before you. I was scared of what you would say or what you would think of me but you surpassed my expectations once again. I need not cower in fear but run with arms wide open.
You are the author of love. You were trying to teach me right then but I got carried away again because that’s what the world does, always wanting to take me away from you. Carly rae Jepsen sings run away with me but I smile because You have been telling me to ‘Come away’ with you the moment Jesus culture strummed the strings of their guitar and crooned the lyrics. Sometimes they sing and it’s like we are alone again. You just smiling down at me and steadying my heart in a world full of chaos. Once again, my heart recognized something, something familiar but you felt so out of reach. I was called to chase after you. I was born to stop at nothing till I have your heart. You saw me even before the world came to existence and you believed I was worth it all.
You stepped into time and space to be with me. You beautiful King whose face outshines the sun. You do not render that kind of affection to celestial beings like those gazillion angels you created. You poured yourself out for me, all of you to have all of me and I am going to do the same for you because that’s what love is about. Giving ourselves to one another.
I sat in church that day when you called out to me again. This time, it was Hillsong’s ‘Love on the line’ and the tears flowed again. That was when you chose our song for us. You whispered ‘Waltz’ and though I have never danced to a waltz before, I knew one thing. You were calling me to dance with you.
And so, we danced. Oh it was beautiful. Right then I saw your intentions for me. That dance depicts a leader and a follower. I was the follower and you were going to be my leader. When we dance, the rhythm is in place. I might not get it the first time, but each and every step, you are aligning my heart with your heart till we become one like when you said you and your father are One.
Those mornings when I spend time with you, for Bethel sings, ‘When you sigh, the wind becomes a sonnet, when you laugh, the storm around me ceases.’ Oh Jesus it’s so true. I only need to be with you and I forget everything else. I am crying and laughing at the same time. Your love has wrecked me and I am no longer who I used to be. I only need to bask in your grace and I see the fruits of your spirit manifesting – Love, joy, peace, self-control. The world and everything around me screams pleasure and oh, I have found sweet pleasure in you that even the world cannot measure up. David said, ‘In your presence, there is fullness of joy, at your right hand, there are pleasures evermore.’ Even the pleasure derived from a man and a woman being together intimately, you gave it, you created it. The brain that interprets everything, you made it function that way. So why won’t I run to you that gives such pleasure? Why would I rather waste time chasing the type that fades into the wind in a few minutes and is no longer there. The day it feels like my human nature wants to take over, I realized that crying out to you like Peter did instead of feeling I can do it on my own solves many problems.
Your love makes me want to tell everyone about you because each and everyone has a story and how can they reject this kind of love? They are not just a face among the crowd or some statistic. You know each of us by name, and you’re ready to build this intimacy with each and every one once they reach for the door of their hearts and open up to you.
The rest is history.
Love is not a heart shaped mess. Look around you, we have a world that seeks to chase after the love that does not originate from the author of love and it has left us bitter, broken hearted and at the mercy of one another on earth.
You wanna know what real love is? It was the day the Son of God hung on a cross shamed in public for the whole world to see reconciling man to himself, opening up a portal for us to spend eternity with Him. From then on, man had a choice to accept or reject such love. It is in accepting that we can learn to love one another irrespective of what they’ve done to us for it was what God did for us. For while we were still sinners, not while we were good, Christ died for us. I do hope you choose wisely.
Much love. xo!